Arcade Spousal Abuse

[LPZ]

I love to surf thru the message board looking for "THAT" great deal or to improve my machine, but lately I hear alot of you guys asking/complaining about permission from your spouse.

[tommy]

Depends, some woman have there men trained to ask or move out. 

If i see a great deal on a cab somewhere its mine, period!!

[CheffoJeffo]

I think perhaps you are reading too much into the spousal banter ... for the most part I would suspect that it is just banter. 

Hey, my wife has had 3 cabinets sitting in the dining room (although the kitchen/dining room are "my" rooms) for more than 8 weeks and doesn't bat an eye (well, she smirks a little) whenever I pickup a new board or control or even a cabinet (and I use HER eBay account and charge HER Paypal account!!!).

Having said that, having the free space that you do (which keeps the inevitable clutter out of the way) helps tremendously.

EDIT: I should mention that I have tons of space in the basement ... the cabs are in the kitchen because the big stairway to the basement was blocked for the winter.

Cheers.

[Timstuff]

I'm only 18 so I'm not gonna have to worry about the spouse issue for a while...

I pretty much only have to worry about the parental units. But they seem pretty OK with it so far, because they are have their own projects that take over the house, so it's not like they're gonna complain about mine. :p

[LPZ]

Yes, I agree....the garage is mine, the house is her's!

[Fat_Trucker]

I come somewhere between the two.

The wife tends to nag incessantly, and I simply switch into 'wife mode' where my brain actually filters most of what she is saying into unintelligble background noise with little or no effort on my part.

[AlanS17]

I've got no significant other, but I do have a roomate - my brother. Technically I rent from him. So I pretty much have to have permission any time I want to bring something home. However, the garage is 100% full and I'd never get a machine up the stairs without his help.

[LPZ]

Believe or not, my wife bugged me about a 4 way joystick for eternity.....(I had 8 ways mounted)......All she wanted to play was ms. pac  I installed a switchable 4/8 way from ultimarc and now everyone is happy!

[AlanS17]

Aren't those t-sticks the coolest? I just got one. I love it. Maybe that's the deep secret to spousal harmony... t-sticks.

[CheffoJeffo]

Believe or not, my wife bugged me about a 4 way joystick for eternity.....(I had 8 ways mounted)......All she wanted to play was ms. pac  I installed a switchable 4/8 way from ultimarc and now everyone is happy!

My wife and her sisters are the ones who actually got me BUILDING (instead of just planning) ... they wanted a "sitdown arcade machine like MsPacMan at the cottage" ... bought an old cocktail for conversion the very next day and my first MAME machine was born.

Cheers

[LPZ]

Gotta luv it...Andy is not only an arcade parts supplier, but a relationship counselor also!

Saving marriages--one at a time.....

[jelwell]

I don't live with my significant other. The main issue that my friends with wives/girlfriends have is space. When the only place to put your cabinets is the living room I can understand why my friend's significant others might complain.

But even so, many of the women I know don't appreciate the time we spend working on the cabinets.
Joseph Elwell.

[monkeybomb]

I have posted several times that my wife wouldn't let me do whatever.  It's tounge and cheeck.  I live in an 800 sq foot apartment with a small area sectioned off and intended to be a dining area.  Instead we ditched our table and have 3 arcade machines there.  I even take up the whole place for several days here and there for specific progects. 

The usual comment I get from people is "wow, your wife sure loves you - you're really lucky".  In contrast my brother has a gym in his garage, brings home 140+ a year and his wife has rejected a simple RBI baseball out there because she doesn't want to see it when she works out.  I feel lucky and very supported.

[dema]

My wife rocks, and she's cool with the whole thing. The only problem my wife has with my obsession is that it eats up a lot of time that we could be spending together. She's completely cool with my expenditures and my plans, but with a 1-1/2 year old baby there is a lot of time that I waste on the inanimate object. She's looking forward to playing it, especially the traditional arcade games, and doesn't haven't a problem with me building as opposed to buying, but sometimes she feels that they are being a little neglected.

It's probably more in my head, but I feel an internal urge to spend as much time with them as possible and work on it once they go to bed or are napping or something. That's part of the reason it's taken longer than it should have to complete it.

[shawnzilla]

The wife lets me have my basement space, provided that I clean up after I'm done tinkering. She supports my hobby as long as it doesn't eat too much into the bank account.

But, I do have to communicate with her enough to let her know that I'd like some time to be left alone to work on my machines. Otherwise she'll call for me every few minutes.

Communication is the key! It's also important to be supportive of your spouse's hobbies.

[Avery]

In general, my wife is HIGHLY supportive of my tool habbit, and OK with my computer and arcade game habbit.

What drew a low WAV (thank you whoever coined that) was when I came home with an emptied out Defender cab.  While it was only 5 miles out of my way to pick it up and $10, the idea that I now had two empty video game cabs soaking up perfectly good house volume did not sit well with her.

[Chris]

I think it's just a matter of respect to confer with a spouse on any major expense or project.

[NoOne=NBA=]

My wife would really like it if I didn't cut and drill inside the house.

USUALLY I get it all cleaned back up before she gets home, and she thanks me for vacuuming. 

[Chris]

My wife would really like it if I didn't cut and drill inside the house.

USUALLY I get it all cleaned back up before she gets home, and she thanks me for vacuuming.

[elvis]

I have the cabinet downstairs away from the main living/entertaining/eating areas.  So if I play it I kind of disappear for a few minutes/hours.  My missus refers to it as "the other woman". 

But then again, she also says that of my work, dog, computer, or any other woodwork projects, or anything that takes my attention away from her for more than 30 seconds.

I've told her instead of nagging me about it, she should possibly get her own hobbies (and not ones that involve me sitting next to her bored while she watches E.R.).  But I don't think the suggestions are getting through.

But other than the odd pouting session, she is "silently supportive".  When mates come over to play or tinker, she just lets us be for a few hours.  For that much, I am verbally thankful to her.  I don't spend excessive amounts on the hobby, and definitely spend 100 times as much time with our daughter than I do anything inanimate, so I think she sees the bright side of the situation.

[markrvp]

My experience has been that if your wife encourages you to spend money on a hobby it means she has some wicked credit card charges she's hiding from you.

[Flinkly]

well, i think there are four main areas for problems.  the simplest is a bad relationship with your wife, thus she'll nag about almost anything you do that she doesn't want you to do.  second, there is the space issue.  most of us are on the younger side, and so live in apartments, which can get cramped fast.  mostly when cabinets are involved.  third, there is the money.  Again, most of us are young, and are still having to watch the funds on a regular basis.  so, when a $250 arcade yoke comes in the mail, she might be a little interested in why it means so much to the family.  fourth is the time.  as it is like in my situation, i don't have enough of it to go around.  so, sometimes she feels a little left out.

overall, if you keep the communication going and try not to get into the red areas of any of these four main areas, then your golden.

[AlanS17]

My experience has been that if your wife encourages you to spend money on a hobby it means she has some wicked credit card charges she's hiding from you.

Ouch...

But when you think about it, it seems kind of fair. This is an expensive hobby. If your'e allowed to spend money, it would only seem fair to me that your significant other should be able to, as well.

Of course, I've got no significant other to report to with my expenses so it's easy for me to say stuff on the matter.

[CheffoJeffo]

My experience has been that if your wife encourages you to spend money on a hobby it means she has some wicked credit card charges she's hiding from you.

 

I've come to the point where I no longer ask ... fortunately, we're in good financial shape these days.

She brought home a blow-up bouncy water slide yesterday (which, I must admit, is a pretty cool addition to our "Funland" and the kids LOVE it) and I didn't even think to ask how much it cost until after I set it up today.

And even then, it turned out to be the same price (on sale) as a non-rare cabinet.

I can accept that.

Cheers.

[Goz]

It is easier to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission. 

Snag the good deals

-Goz

[HyperHautian]

Well, I allways ask before I start any new project... especially when it involves money.. we don't have money issues, but since we DO have a good relationship, I (and my wife) allways talk to each other before we are going to spend money (seems like the courteous thing to do).

[Shadowgate]

My fiancee doesn't seem to mind my arcade hobby too much. Although I have the arcade machine in my office and its out of the way mostly. She mostly objects to the money being spent on the project. 

[nostrebor]

After seeing the bills for car restoration and stock car building and racing hobbies, my spouse has embraced my new hobby with MUCH happiness.

The big difference for me is that my hobbies are usually self-supporting financially. I horse-trade and labor-trade to the point that there is no affect on our day to day expenses. The biggest cost is time, and that is my responsibility to keep right. My priorities must be (in order of importance) family, church, work, hobbies. As long as I keep this perspective, she willingly accepts my games.

[Daniel270]

She made it perfectly clear for me...

The MAME^TM is mine...

the Gyruss is hers!!

[NinjaEpisode]

My wife has no problem with it.

[Witchboard]

This topic wouldn't have been started in regards to THIS thread on RGVAC, would it?  It was just started today.

[RayB]

LPZ: Do you not see any irony in the fact that your games are relegated to the GARAGE? I think most women could care less what's in a garage, since it's out of sight...

[Thenasty]

yea my wife "SUCKS" and I LOVE IT

[kickngas]

 How appropriate that this be my first post!  When my cabinet (that I have totally put together and dismantled/improved in my dreams 10 times) is built,  I am going to put it in our study or as my wife says, "anywhere you want it, Honey".  This being my second marriage, I can really appreciate her support on any of my "projects"!

[steptoe]

Well !!! ive been married for ten years, 3 kids under 8, and there was no way i was going to build a cab, then one day she saw all the invoices on my email, rang me at work and said,"WTF is this", i explained it was some parts for the cab so its too late, a few days later she was over it. Then all my time was in the shed, she had to do it all, cook, clean, bath the kids,,,feed them. "that stupid F&^%$#g thing. THen one day i said," what color you think, definately black, how about the t-moulding, grey she said", then came the whats this for, how do you turn it on, some interest. I explained that its a jukebox as well, not to mention the karaoke for the kids. All sweet now, i asked if i could bring it inside for final comissioning as its starting to get cold here, she said" No F Way". Little does she know when she gets home today the frigging things going to be in the lounge room, Hehehehehe.

[slayj]

I saw the Project Arcade book and, in passing, mentioned how cool it would be to have an arcade at home.  Last Xmas she bought the book as a gift and said "Have fun!"  My wife rocks!! 

[KenToad]

I passed up on a free gutted Defender cab that Wade was giving away primarily because of my fiancee's disapproval of that usage of our admittedly very limited space.  So, now I'm building a gargantuan bartop with modular cp's.  I haven't explained to her yet that modular means that I will be ordering even more controls.  She gets suspicious about all those packages, but hey I'm loving this hobby.  I'm actually learning about electronics and woodworking at the same time.  I think she may be getting accustomed to the big box.  It's vertical space that matters most to her and, since I'm 6'2", I need something sort of height adjustable anyway.  I'd hate to have to try to always fit my head under the marquees of those classic machines in my own home.

I agree with Gozur's mantra.  She's beautiful and she's German, so she gets her way sometimes.

Cheers,
KenToad

[NoOne=NBA=]

After seeing the bills for car restoration and stock car building and racing hobbies, my spouse has embraced my new hobby with MUCH happiness.

My wife's dad is a hardcore golfer.
Anytime she thinks I'm spending too much, I just remind her that I could take up golf again.
That usually brings a quick end to the discussion.

[vib_ribbon]

i live in a fairly small flat in the city and i bought my cab before i got married. the flat has 2 bedrooms, a lot of my junk used to be in the spare/ guest room but the cab was in the master bedroom...

needless to say, it was moved to the spare room before we got married and now, prior to moving house i've sold it, with the thought that i'd be buying a new one once we settle into our newer and bigger home (a house rather than a flat).

my wife never had any problems with the unit. i even bought some 2 player girl-friendly games like puzzle bobble/ bubble bobble that we can play together on. but it was gonna be a problem moving it with us because of the size/ weight of the machine.

so now i'm "cab-less" and all my boards, spare buttons/ sticks are in storage. hope those cps2 boards won't die on me when the day comes to plugging them back in...

[MonitorGuru]

Ditto -- My new wife of 2 months (girlfriend of 5+ years, live-in for 3+) actively encourages it.  I hold back and she says why not get another project game.  Never mind I am almost out of room in the house and the 3rd garage stall will have to become the new storage spot for extra's.

I wouldn't have married her if she was going to become "the boss of me". We are neither the boss of each other.  If one spouse bosses the other around with demands and prevents you from enjoying yourself (as long as you're not overboard), then you have a problem in your marriage. Seriously.

It's almost like where there are so many women who continue to get verbally assulted as well as physically and stay in a "bad marriage" becuase "they love the guy"... the same holds true the other way... if you can financially, space and timewise 'afford' your hobby, and your significant other places tons of demands/restrictions and complains at everything you do, and you're one to post "i gotta pass this by the wife" or "the wife won't let me do this"... then you have the same problem and should seek consoling. Seriously... Especially if you're the one bringing in most/all the income AND she has similar cost (time and money) hobbies that you don't complain about.

Marriage is about equality, not one side "ruling" the other.