BYORD (Build Your Own ring Detector):
This will work with regular land line phones, but I dont know about the VOIP. But if the VOIP will ring a regular phone, I dont see why it wouldnt work.
http://www.epanorama.net/circuits/telephone_ringer.htmlI made something similar to this years ago to flash a lamp for my mom when the phone rang, she was going deaf at the time.
I cant find the schematic to it, but it is similar to the one linked, except instead of C1, D1, and D2, I used a small neon bulb. The neon bulb conducts at around 90 volts, so it worked very well.
I also used a triac compatible Opto Isolator and a triac to turn on the 120 volt lamp, but if you just want to blink an led you wont need a triac.
And if you would like to know when the phone line is being used by someone else, or a dial up modem, or fax machine, here is another circuit that will tell you that: (Thanks to Aberto Ricci) (again, not sure about VOIP usage)
http://www.riccibitti.com/quickdesigns.htm