Dumbest thing you've ever done to yourself?

[Jdurg]

Okay, what's the dumbest thing you've ever done that resulted in bodily harm to yourself?  Today, I think I did a pretty good one.   

Last night, I was down in my basement working on my Control Panel.  The bottom part has been cut and I was gluing some support pieces that I can drill the sides into.  There is only one door to my basement and that is from inside my house.  It's a normal door with a little hook and eye latch up at the top.  In my entire time at the house I have NEVER used the latch.  EVER.  For some reason, when I got down with my woodworking last night I went and latched the door shut.  (The latch is at the very top of the door above eye level).

This morning, I had to wake up early to prepare for a work meeting that started at 6:30.  So I was up at 4:45, but my mind was still well asleep.  I used the bathroom on the first floor and saw that I was out of hand soap.  So I had to go downstairs into the basement to get another bottle. 

I went to open the door and it wouldn't open.  This was puzzling to me.  I thought that perhaps it had just gotten stuck.  So I tried to open it with a little more force, and it opened very slightly but not all the way.  Again, my brain was not yet awake so I just let natural instinct go into effect.

I braced myself and grabbed the doorknob.  With as much force as I could muster, I forcefully pulled the door open.  I heard a tiny "snap" then WHAM!!!  The door opened wide and smacked me right in the nose!  I saw a flash of light then felt blood start pouring down out of my nose.  It was then that I realized I had latched the door shut the night before, and the tiny "snap" was the hook/eye assembly ripping out of the woodwork.  Meanwhile, my nose is pouring out blood and I'm rushing to contain the mess.  (Thankfully, the polyurethane finish on the hardwood floors caused the blood to puddle up for easy clean-up). 

Running back into the bathroom, I applied some cold water to my nose and noticed that I had a bright red scratch on my upper lip from where the door hit my face, but the nose itself wasn't swollen at all nor was it bruised.  So thankfully, I don't believe I broke it.  I just severely messed up the inside of the nose and any little scratch to the nose results in copious amounts of blood pouring out.

So here I sit at work with a bright red mark on my upper lip from the door and soreness and 'discomfort' in my nose.  If I sneeze, my office looks like the inside of JFK's limo at Deely Plaza.   

As time goes by, this gets funnier and funnier to me, but damn.  WTF was I thinking?!!!!

[ChadTower]

Dumbest thing I've done intentionally?  First thing that comes to mind is riding my 20" bike off a 2 story cliff when I was 11.  There is water at the bottom and we used to jump off of it all the time... and I used to jump my bike off of anything we could build or find.  Let's just say my plan of pushing the bike away from myself didn't work and I landed on it.  No broken bones, lots of bad bruises, and I hit my nuts on the handlebars.

Nuts on handlebars from two stories up = worst pain ever.  I almost drowned because I was throwing up.

My unintentional list probably isn't nearly as long as the intentional list.

[saint]

I started a web site...

[Glaine]

I grew up working in a furniture factory. One of my jobs was to staple up the cardboard insert stuff that they wrap desks in when they ship em. Well, the huge air-powered stapler that I used had these nasty looking metal teeth that would stab through the cardboard and bend a staple into it at the same time. Well, it got be quite boring and so I thought I would scare my brother by using the staple gun to clench around my thumb but not onto it (the gap seemed really big between the teeth). Yeah, that didn't work out.

The gun looked something like the attached picture, except it didn't have the pressure button on the nose, it would clench just by using the trigger.

If I sneeze, my office looks like the inside of JFK's limo at Deely Plaza.

Awesome line.

[missioncontrol]

I started a web site...

 

[Jdurg]

Last weekend I was drilling out rivets on an EM pinball gearbox and the bit broke and I drilled a hole in my thumbnail.  It drips pus and blood while I type.  :-P

Ewww!  Thankfully, I haven't had any "incidents" involving power tools or other potentially dangerous items.  I, sadly, seem to find ways to hurt myself at random when very little danger is involved.  Things such as tripping over my own feet when walking and thus spraining an ankle.  Or slipping on a floor, trying to catch myself before falling, and instead shattering my Tibia.  If only I could be as safe doing normal things as I am when using dangerous power tools or working with dangerous chemicals.........

[shardian]

I honestly can't think of many things. I've never broke anything major - just fingers and toes. I slammed my fingers in a mini-van sliding door once. That sucked.

Ah, I can think of a semi-dumb move from college. I played water basketball in the college pool with some fellow dorm mates. I was blocking out a dude under the basket and didn't realize how far I had backed up. When a guy shot, I turned and jumped up to get the rebound...and slammed my face right into one of the net hooks of the rim. When I say slammed, I mean with authority.   It dragged down the middle of my forehead, and cut my nose pretty bad. I had a huge lump on my forehead, and had to get x-rays to rule out anything else bad. I still have a small scar on the bridge of my nose. Nothing broke, but I had a hella bad headache for a few days. I didn't play water ball any more after that.

[Jdurg]

Hehe.  Yeah, the head bleeds like crazy if you damage it in any manner.  Most of the time, however, it's nothing severe.  Like I REALLY hit my nose hard this morning with the door, but nothing broke.  I can tell because when I put pressure on my nose or squeeze it, there's some pain but not 'It's broken' pain.  I've broken many bones before and know what that pain feels like.  (Granted, the nose is cartilage and not bone, but it's pretty similar).  I'm just thankful that the external damage isn't that severe and will cover up and go away pretty quickly.  The congestion I feel inside my nose and the scabbing going on in there will be a ---smurfette--- for a while though.   

[ChadTower]

I can say this from experience:  it's very difficult to break a bone via blunt force from something softer than the bone.  If it were easy I'd have spent half my childhood in traction.

[AcidArmitage]

once my friend acted like he was giving me a low five... but he pulled his hand away and i smacked myself in the nuts really hard... nothings worse than hitting yourself really hard in the nuts in public

[shardian]

I had the brilliant idea to wave a bag of cat poop in front of my wife's (then fiance) face once. She was sitting, I was standing. She punched me right in the nuts, but she swears to this day she was just trying to shoo away the bag. Trust me, the whole event played out in super slow mo for me and I know where she was looking and where she was aiming.

I guess that qualifies as stupid actions causing bodily harm, right?

[Glaine]

Don't watch if you get queasy easy
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPsYPKotBT8[/youtube]

[boykster]

Dumbest thing that caused major physical distress:

I was making some thai dish (Phad Thai I think) and I had a ziplock bag full of ground dried thai chiles - think fine powder. I accidentally dragged the bag across one of the stove burners set to HIGH and about 2 tbsp of the chile powder turned into pepper gas - my head was directly over it.  I nearly passed out from coughing and my eyes were red for a week.

Most unfortunate physical harm:

Loaded a 4x8 sheet of plywood on my SUV and was tying it down with some bungee cords.  These cords had plastic adjustable hooks, not the metal ones.  As I was tensioning down the final cord, one of the hooks snapped and the cord shot straight back and hit me directly in the eye.  No major damage, but I did cause some injury and bleeding inside the eye.  Took a few days for the swelling and pain to go away.

(edited for spelling)

[Jdurg]

Man, as the day is going by the pain in my nose and, more noticeably now, in my teeth is getting pretty bad.  I have to blow my nose but it hurts to put that much pressure on it.  Arrggghhh!  Ah well.  I'll take some ibuprofen when I get home and just get some rest.  Hopefully the discomfort will go away soon.

[ErikRuud]

Jdurg,  I feel your pain.  Almost literally.  I got smacked in the nose last night during karate class.  No blood, swelling or bruising, but it still hurts pretty bad.  The inside of my upper lip is pretty sore as well.  I saw the same flash of light.

[shardian]

I caught a kick in the nose during a Tae Kwon Doe tournament when I was 13 or so. Heard a crunch, saw some pretty fireworks, and next thing I knew I was on my butt with blood all over me. It didn't actually break my nose, But I'd say it did crush the cartilage of my bridge a bit. Either way, definitely not fun.

[Jdurg]

Jdurg,  I feel your pain.  Almost literally.  I got smacked in the nose last night during karate class.  No blood, swelling or bruising, but it still hurts pretty bad.  The inside of my upper lip is pretty sore as well.  I saw the same flash of light.

The ironic thing is, I had just had my annual eye doctor's appointment yesterday afternoon and while sitting in the waiting room I read a pamphlet about flashes of light in your vision.  It happens when you get hit because the back of your eye absorbs some of the impact from the blow. 

Ironic that after reading about it I wound up experiencing it first hand.

The annoying thing is that it's not really pain I'm feeling, but more of a pressure/discomfort.  The worst part is that I can't really blow it all out of my sinuses and nose because then it does hurt when that much pressure is put there.  Arrrggghhhh!!!!!!!!  Thankfully that ---Bad words, bad words, whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when saint censors you?--- latch was ripped out of the wall so I don't have to worry about it anymore, but damn!

[boykster]

 

[mountain]

OK, here's one for ya.

My junior year of High School I was out partying with friends.  My friends dropped me off at the house I leaned back into the car to say goodbye. I had rested my hand in the door jamb and when I closed the door, I didn't remove it fast enough. I slammed my left index finger in the door and it completely closed. Dumb I know, but it gets dumberer. 

2-3 days go by and the finger nail area is thumping badly and is extremely sensitive to the touch. The nail is black and the entire end of my finger is double its normal size. I was on my last nerve when I remembered what my Dad told me. To relieve the pressure on an injury like this, a Doctor will used a thin, hot metal rod to poke a hole in the nail. This drains fluid from under the nail and the pressure feeling goes away. Unfortunately, my parents were out of town at the time and I was desperate. So I go out to the garage and try to find a drill and a small drill bit. All that my Dad had was a variable speed, 1/2" Craftsman drill with the big handle on the side. The only drill bit I could find in the bottom of the tool box was probably around 1/16". I thought, "This will work" 

I placed my hand on the work bench and began. As I started drilling I realized that this was going to suck. I was hesitant to put any pressure on the fingernail because it was very sore. The slightest bump was excruciating. Because of this, the drill bit was barely making a mark. After adding a little more pressure I began to notice some progress, but damn it hurt a lot more. Plus, my arm was getting tired of holding this behemoth drill up. After 15 minutes or so, all I had to show for my efforts was a concave shape in the center of my nail. Fed up and tired of the pain, I mustered up the guts to turn this operation up a notch. As I clenched my teeth in anticipation of the pain, I pushed the drill harder into the nail. I guess the pain was so bad that I tensed up and squeezed the trigger to full speed. This combined with the extra pressure did the trick. As the drill bit broke through the under side of the nail, it caught the nail and jerked my entire hand clockwise violently. After regaining my composure, I noticed the perfect red line on my chest. It was blood from the nail? Yup, I looked down at the drill lying on the floor and saw my fingernail still stuck to the end of the drill bit. 

Luckily for me and my family, I'm not as dumb as I once was.

[david656]

no way ! jesus ! moutain ! god ! i feel sorry for you !!

i shut my head in a door once being dumb! i was making a stupid face at someone and closing the door slowly and didn't realise how far my head was in and in sort of slow motion hit my head between the door frame and a fire door !

[grantspain]

you know that bit in tom and jerry when tom stands on a garden rake,well i tried that when i was a kid and knocked a tooth out

[mountain]

no way ! jesus ! moutain ! god ! i feel sorry for you !!

No worries, it only hurts when it's cold 

[boykster]

you know that bit in tom and jerry when tom stands on a garden rake,well i tried that when i was a kid and knocked a tooth out

ack, this reminds me of probably the dumbest thing I did...was playing tennis on a friday after class, got pissed at myself for missing a shot and threw my racket at the ground - straight down at the ground.  Bounced straight back up and broke one of my front teeth off...well, not completely off, about 1/4 of it was left broken at a pretty harsh angle.  Had to wait until monday to have the dentist put a temp cap on it....

 

[knave]

I thought to myself, "Hey, a link on my keychain is opening. I'll fix that right up..."

<Chomp>

I promptly was spitting out shards of tooth as my top front tooth shattered as I tried to bite it closed.

 

It was pretty embarassing explaining that one to my Dentist father...At least I got it fixed for free.

[CheffoJeffo]

Loaded a 4x8 sheet of plywood on my SUV and was tying it down with some bungee cords.  These cords had plastic adjustable hooks, not the metal ones.  As I was tensioning down the final cord, one of the hooks snapped and the cord shot straight back and hit me directly in the eye.  No major damage, but I did cause some injury and bleeding inside the eye.  Took a few days for the swelling and pain to go away.

We've got another member here that's confused about loading up sheets of wood, so you're not alone. 

 

Dammit -- beat me to it !

 

[ChadTower]

ack, this reminds me of probably the dumbest thing I did...was playing tennis on a friday after class, got pissed at myself for missing a shot and threw my racket at the ground - straight down at the ground.  Bounced straight back up and broke one of my front teeth off...well, not completely off, about 1/4 of it was left broken at a pretty harsh angle.  Had to wait until monday to have the dentist put a temp cap on it....

When I played tennis every day I probably saw someone do that every couple of months.  Amazingly, a couple of people did it twice.

[boykster]

We've got another member here that's confused about loading up sheets of wood, so you're not alone. 

 

Dammit -- beat me to it !

 

Hey!  At least I got the wood ONTO the truck without asking questions 

ack, this reminds me of probably the dumbest thing I did...was playing tennis on a friday after class, got pissed at myself for missing a shot and threw my racket at the ground - straight down at the ground.  Bounced straight back up and broke one of my front teeth off...well, not completely off, about 1/4 of it was left broken at a pretty harsh angle.  Had to wait until monday to have the dentist put a temp cap on it....

When I played tennis every day I probably saw someone do that every couple of months.  Amazingly, a couple of people did it twice.

I believe it;  I've <almost> thrown my racket that way again...but the thought of breaking my tooth gives me just enough self control to not do it.  I've seen a few similar incidents, no broken teeth but plenty of broken rackets and even one black eye from chucking a racket...

[shardian]

OK, here's one for ya.

My junior year of High School I was out partying with friends.  My friends dropped me off at the house I leaned back into the car to say goodbye. I had rested my hand in the door jamb and when I closed the door, I didn't remove it fast enough. I slammed my left index finger in the door and it completely closed. Dumb I know, but it gets dumberer. 

2-3 days go by and the finger nail area is thumping badly and is extremely sensitive to the touch. The nail is black and the entire end of my finger is double its normal size. I was on my last nerve when I remembered what my Dad told me. To relieve the pressure on an injury like this, a Doctor will used a thin, hot metal rod to poke a hole in the nail. This drains fluid from under the nail and the pressure feeling goes away. Unfortunately, my parents were out of town at the time and I was desperate. So I go out to the garage and try to find a drill and a small drill bit. All that my Dad had was a variable speed, 1/2" Craftsman drill with the big handle on the side. The only drill bit I could find in the bottom of the tool box was probably around 1/16". I thought, "This will work" 

I placed my hand on the work bench and began. As I started drilling I realized that this was going to suck. I was hesitant to put any pressure on the fingernail because it was very sore. The slightest bump was excruciating. Because of this, the drill bit was barely making a mark. After adding a little more pressure I began to notice some progress, but damn it hurt a lot more. Plus, my arm was getting tired of holding this behemoth drill up. After 15 minutes or so, all I had to show for my efforts was a concave shape in the center of my nail. Fed up and tired of the pain, I mustered up the guts to turn this operation up a notch. As I clenched my teeth in anticipation of the pain, I pushed the drill harder into the nail. I guess the pain was so bad that I tensed up and squeezed the trigger to full speed. This combined with the extra pressure did the trick. As the drill bit broke through the under side of the nail, it caught the nail and jerked my entire hand clockwise violently. After regaining my composure, I noticed the perfect red line on my chest. It was blood from the nail? Yup, I looked down at the drill lying on the floor and saw my fingernail still stuck to the end of the drill bit. 

Luckily for me and my family, I'm not as dumb as I once was.

Ding ding ding!! We have a winnah!!

[Raleigh]

Unfortunately I end doing a lot of stupid crap that should have easily been avoided.

One thing recently was when I was demoing a barn that was blown over by the wind.  It was a metal/wire corn crib (see pic below for reference) and had collapsed over like dominoes.  I'm an accountant by trade so I don't do too much manual labor but I'm too cheap to pay someone to demo it when I can take all the metal beams and stuff to the scrap yard and generate cash.  Well after I had taken all the roofing and wood off all that remained where the series of metal beams with wire (chain link fence like).  The metal beams ran about every 4 feet or so and had a metal support that was bolted to connect the beams and the wiring enclosed it on the outside to keep the corn inside.  Well I left the wiring on the outside(even on it's side the outside was still like 10' off the ground) so I can walk on it while I unbolt the supports to free up the beams to be cut up into prepared scrap.  At one point I had dropped a wrench down into the inside so I ended up cutting out a 3'x3' section of the wiring so I could drop down inside and retrieve it.  After getting it I walked down and continued on and was working my way back when I made it back to the opening without realizing it.  Suddenly half my body fell through the opening and my leg got all cut up by the cut wiring.  It was over the summer when it was over 90 so I was stupidly in shorts and it was all flesh that was torn.  So now on the back of my left leg from my mid hamstring area down to my ankle I've got 3 scared lines and when I wear shorts people ask if I got chased down by some wild animal.

[shmokes]

About six years ago my wife took a beginning French 1010 (or 101 depending where you live) class.  She didn't work especially hard in it.  She got a C.  It's the only French class she ever took.

So, a couple years later I decided to learn French because I wanted to eventually live and work in Paris.  I took French 1010.  I got an A in the class, because I worked ---my bottom--- off, but this professor was a hard ass.  Just a total rat bastard, and very difficult.  When I was getting ready to register for French 1020 the following semester, my wife said that she wanted to register too, so we could learn French together.  But after the experience I had with this French professor, I discouraged her.  She couldn't remember a thing from French 1010, and based on my experience, I didn't think she could hack 1020, being so out of practice. 

It turned out that my professor for 1020 was amazing -- probably the best professor I've ever had.  What's more, Stacy would have done just fine in there (for god's sake, she was living with me . . . it's not like I couldn't tutor her).  Fast forward four years, and you have me with a BA in French, and Stacy with no French whatsoever.  I want to go live in Paris as soon as possible after I finish school.  Stacy's cool with it, but she only wants to stay for a year.  I'm hoping that she'll get over there and love it so much that we'll end up staying for at least two or three years, but her chances of falling that much in love with it aren't nearly as high as they would be if she could speak the language.

Talking her out of taking that class is the single biggest regret of my entire life, I think.  Not only would she be a lot more inclined to follow me around the world, but I'd also be speaking MUCH better French cos I'd have someone to practice with on a regular basis.

At any rate . . . that's my stupid thing.  Sorry that there's no blood involved.

[shardian]

About six years ago my wife took a beginning French 1010 (or 101 depending where you live) class.  She didn't work especially hard in it.  She got a C.  It's the only French class she ever took.

So, a couple years later I decided to learn French because I wanted to eventually live and work in Paris.  I took French 1010.  I got an A in the class, because I worked ---my bottom--- off, but this professor was a hard ass.  Just a total rat bastard, and very difficult.  When I was getting ready to register for French 1020 the following semester, my wife said that she wanted to register too, so we could learn French together.  But after the experience I had with this French professor, I discouraged her.  She couldn't remember a thing from French 1010, and based on my experience, I didn't think she could hack 1020, being so out of practice. 

It turned out that my professor for 1020 was amazing -- probably the best professor I've ever had.  What's more, Stacy would have done just fine in there (for god's sake, she was living with me . . . it's not like I couldn't tutor her).  Fast forward four years, and you have me with a BA in French, and Stacy with no French whatsoever.  I want to go live in Paris as soon as possible after I finish school.  Stacy's cool with it, but she only wants to stay for a year.  I'm hoping that she'll get over there and love it so much that we'll end up staying for at least two or three years, but her chances of falling that much in love with it aren't nearly as high as they would be if she could speak the language.

Talking her out of taking that class is the single biggest regret of my entire life, I think.  Not only would she be a lot more inclined to follow me around the world, but I'd also be speaking MUCH better French cos I'd have someone to practice with on a regular basis.

At any rate . . . that's my stupid thing.  Sorry that there's no blood involved.

Ummm...why are you letting this class stop you from teaching her? Rosetta Stone, Pimsleur, etc. Obviously if she didn't apply herself in the first class, she would not have applied herself in the second class. Not everyone can learn a language in a school setting.

[ChadTower]

So now on the back of my left leg from my mid hamstring area down to my ankle I've got 3 scared lines and when I wear shorts people ask if I got chased down by some wild animal.

When I was 11 I accidentally put my hand through a window.  Slashed my left wrist in several places, leaving two parallel scars right across the veins below my palm.  The scars are just about gone now but people used to occasionally ask me if that was from a suicide attempt.  The actual cuts weren't deep enough for that, just really wide, because it was New England thickness house glass.

[Jdurg]

I have lots of stupid things I've done to myself, sadly.  A few years ago I was just learning how to play golf and would spend hours out on the driving range trying to get things right.  I was at the driving range one day when all of a sudden my swing disappeared.  (This was in January when it got up to 50 Degrees and I decided to hit the range on the abnormally warm day).  I was so pissed that I couldn't swing like I had been just a few weeks earlier that I took my 8-iron and just slammed it into the ground. 

The warmth caused the top of the ground to be nice and soft, but about two inches down or so it was still frozen solid.  Silly me just kept my grip on the club and as it went into the ground my wrist snapped backwards from the force.  It hurt like hell and my wrist started swelling a little bit.

I went to the doctor to get it checked out and he took some x-rays.  I apparently shattered my Hammate bone in my wrist for which there is no real treatment to give except for pain killers and rest.  I was told to drink plenty of milk, take some calcium supplements, and not use my wrist too much for the next six weeks or so.   

[whammoed]

I was smashing up an old toilet with a mini sledge so it would fit in our dumpster.  I accidentally let my hand go into some of the debris and cut my finger which led to a hospital visit and stitches.  I can handle other peoples blood fine, but when I see my own gushing out, I nearly pass out. 

I believe it;  I've <almost> thrown my racket that way again...but the thought of breaking my tooth gives me just enough self control to not do it.  I've seen a few similar incidents, no broken teeth but plenty of broken rackets and even one black eye from chucking a racket...

I played tennis since I was 12 including high school and college tennis and never saw anyone smack themselves in the face before...but one time my buddy got mad and kicked his racket just right so that it flew over the fence.  Funny sight it was.

[CheffoJeffo]

I went to the doctor to get it checked out and he took some x-rays.  I apparently shattered my Hammate bone in my wrist for which there is no real treatment to give except for pain killers and rest.  I was told to drink plenty of milk, take some calcium supplements, and not use my wrist too much for the next six weeks or so.   

Ah ... visits from The Stranger(tm) ...

 

[ChadTower]

I was on our high school tennis team for three years - very weak team because it was a low income area and I was one of our only good players.  There was a fat kid on our team that played doubles.  He was nearly immobile - fast hands but his feet were like lead.  Somehow, a few games into every single match, the opponents would decide that instead of hitting the ball past him they would rocket the ball at him on every other point.  He'd take balls off the face, neck, chest... I'd be watching trying not to laugh but damn was that some funny stuff.

[whammoed]

He'd take balls off the face, neck, chest... I'd be watching trying not to laugh but damn was that some funny stuff.

I laughed just reading that.

I once had an opponent who refused to give up the net even though he popped up a high, easy forehand on my side very close to the net.  I just couldn't resist the urge and hit him right in the face with the shot.  Only time I've ever knocked down an opponent in a match.  He had immediate swelling...looked like he got punched in the face.

[ChadTower]

I laughed just reading that.

There were a couple of towns in the area that were very wealthy - summer houses for megarich wealthy.  The kids from these towns, when they played our school in the "money" sports (tennis, hockey, etc) would be hardcore arrogant and would just taunt the crap out of us (we would return the favor in less "money" sports - football, basketball, etc).  I could play tennis with those kids but was one of only two in our school that could.  Those kids would just tool on this fat kid - I mean yelling right across the net about how fat, stupid, poor, ugly, aborted, handicapped, he must have been.  I remember one doubles pair in particular spent the whole match making loud jokes about "his tits".  They were loudly talking back and forth about which one to hit - and making bets on "who can hit the left tit first", stuff like that.  They were just brutal to this kid. 

The dumbest part?  The kid would just take it - despite being 6-2 275 and strong as a house.  I still don't understand why.

[shardian]

I don't understand why tennis is a money sport anyways. In my area, I have my pick of several nice public tennis court areas. Rackets aren't expensive at all for a decent one. Anyone can play and the rules are easy. I've played recreationally my whole life, but never tried for the team because "I wasn't a rich kid", and because I wasn't skinny. Even though I could hang with almost all of them, I felt I wasn't part of the club. My wife played on her Middle School tennis team, but was ridiculed and bumped down in rank because she wasn't one of the rich kids.

I took a Tennis class in college and met two guys who were life long players for good school teams. I played quite regularly against them until I switched colleges. That just pissed me off more because after playing real competition on a regular basis made me realize what all I missed out on because of the "rich kid" image of Tennis.

I hope that I can get my little girl to play tennis, that way she can whoop ass on all of those rich punks.

[knave]

I was tearing the shingles off of my roof and when I reached the peak I thought it would be a good idea to use a prybar to slide under the remaining shingles to loosten them.

I was vigorously sliding the bar under the shingles when one particularly hard push went too far and the asphalt shingal slid under my right thumbnail allmost to the cuticle.

Hurt like a Mofo.  Worse still after I pulled the shingle out from under my nail I had bits or tar and grit embedded under there.  Cleaning them out was not fun.

[ChadTower]

I don't understand why tennis is a money sport anyways.

Mostly because the wealthy kids here play at closed, private facilities with top tier professional instruction from an early age.  There's just no way the average kid is going to compete with them without being insanely talented.  I worked ---my bottom--- off learning on my own for years - and was a far better athlete than many of these kids - but still just broke the bottom tier of the level they were playing on.  It's not a money sport to learn.  It's a money sport to really compete at when you're young.

The odd part about hockey is that where I grew up it isn't a money sport.  It sure as hell is in New England, though.

[hulkster]

i dont know if its the dumbest thing ive ever done, but its arcade related so this is definitely the place to post it....

back in 2004 i think it was, i was building my second cab (Mamestrosity), and i was at the point where i had just cut the slots for the tmolding.  i got my tmolding in the mail and was all excited to slap it on my cab.  so...

i sit down, indian style, with my tmolding in my lap, and my trust box cutter knife.  i was cutting parts of the tmolding strip into pieces, and like a smart person, i was cutting TOWARDS me.  one piece in particular wouldnt cut real easy, so i was pulling pretty hard TOWARDS me to get it to cut it.  while doing this i was thinking to myself "i probably shouldnt be cutting this with the blade towards me, but ill be fine".  and yep, when i got to the end of the strip, the knife came forward and went straight into my calf.  didnt hurt, but i think i hit a vein or something cuz blood was squirting up into my face...all over my moms carpet.  i put my hand over it to keep it from going on the carpet, but it was gushing out and seeping out of my hands.  it was about 1 a.m. so my mom was asleep so i couldnt yell for her to help.  i put my second hand over it, but i couldnt stand up. 

...hey, you try putting two hands on your calf and trying to stand up at the same time without letting go.  yeah, not easy....

i hopped to the bathroom, and happened to have my cell phone on me.  called our house phone from my cell phone, and my mom came down with towels.  i still have the scar to this day.


oh and one last thing thats arcade related injury stuff....i dropped a half sheet of mdf at about chest high on my right big toe while trying to put the back of my compartment onto my cab.  woke up the neighbors with my cussing :-)

[Mauzy]

I have a couple arcade related that happened on the same day with the same cabinet.

My dad and I drove about 90 miles south to pick up a converted Midway cab (turned out to be a Galaga *actually a Ms Pac but Im not a fan Ms Pac and the sideart was literally gone*) Anyway, we loaded the cab in the back of the truck and hauled it home. It was advertised as dead, but I went ahead and plugged it in. Nothing. Without thinking I reached in the back of the cab to check the PS. It was a little dark in the cab, and I could see the power supply was connected to the power cord. If was toward the front of the cab, so while leaning in to grab it, I put a hand on the inside base of the cab and felt one helluva jolt! The shock surprised me which made me jump. Of course the monitor is mounted pretty low in the cab, so in jumping I smashed my head on the chassis. Luckily No damaged was done. Just a small burn on my hand and a good sized lump on my head. Luckily my parents weren't out there as I had a few choice words for the whole thing.

The Next day...

Dad and I were carrying the cab into the basement. I had the top, and he had the bottom. We got to the bottom of the stairs and placed it in a good spot for dismantling. He left and I noticed one of the leg levelers was missing. I tracked in down and tilted the cabinet back to put it in place. I thought I had it balanced against the wall properly, but turns out it wasn't. The thing rocked forward with both arms under it. Luckily, I had gotten the leg in, so it didn't completely crush my arms, but I had a heck of a time getting it off without the use of my arms...

Ive done several stupid things to hurt myself, but most involve electricity. Ive never broken wany bones, shipped teeth, or torn off fingernails as you geniuses  have.

[shmokes]

Ummm...why are you letting this class stop you from teaching her? Rosetta Stone, Pimsleur, etc. Obviously if she didn't apply herself in the first class, she would not have applied herself in the second class. Not everyone can learn a language in a school setting.

Well . . . there's two problems with that.  One is that she always has plans to do that stuff.  I have all the Pimsleur French stuff, beginner, intermediate and advanced.  But that sort of thing isn't for everybody.  Some people need the structured classroom to learn effectively, as much for the discipline it provides as  anything else.  In fact, I think about 99% of people in the world fall into this category.  How many people have you met who have intended to learn a language with Rosetta Stone or something like it?  Probably more than one.  How many people have you known who learned a language (or even a substantial part of one) with a program like that?  Probably less than one.

Which brings me to another problem.  I've been through all 30 units of each of the three levels of the Pimsleur system, twice each.  I was very impressed with it.  It taught me almost nothing.  It's good practice, and it does teach some stuff.  It even seems at first to be teaching a lot.  But there's just so much to know.  If you came to an absolute mastery of all the material Pimsleur has to offer, with nothing else, and went to France, you would not be able to hold basic conversations.  You would know quite a few semi-useful phrases, and you'd at least have a small amount of knowledge to work with, but it's not much.  And what I got from all of the Pimsleur I did doesn't even remotely compare to what you get out of a single semester in a university upper-level language course.  What's even funnier is that class isn't even an especially good way to learn a language.  It is a good way to give you a foundation, especially with the written language, but you need to spend a significant amount of time in a place where people speak the language natively if you want to become fluent.  I've got a BA in French, probably with a 3.8 or 3.9 GPA if only looking at my French courses, and I spent a month in France over the Summer and I don't even pretend to be fluent yet.

So, anyway, it's a tough proposition.  I do encourage Stacy to do the Pimsleur stuff, and even to start working through my French text books and let me help her, but that takes dedication.  She comes home from work and then does 90% of the child-rearing stuff while I've got my nose in my casebooks 'till 2 or 3am every day.  When we finally put the baby down around 9:00, she's just not inclined to do much of anything that involves effort.  I ain't gonna nag her after she's been working her ass off for the past 16 hours.  That's probably the quickest route I could take to souring her against living in France . . .   

[RTSDaddy2]

Merciful God, I have never broken a bone or had anything quite like the horror show that's here......but...

1) About age 12, I was chasing a friend of mine around the wooden playground set at our school - some stupid tag game, I suppose.  Anyway, they have those nice 2 x 4 wood beams for the girls to practice walking on at several corners.  He jumps over one full speed....and I followed...or at least, I intended to.

My left leg cleared....my right knee slammed into the board at full speed (however fast kids can run).  I really thought I'd messed it up good, I could hardly walk on it the rest of the day. Then, of course, my father decided he knew what would fix it and immobilized it (i mean totally) in an ACE bandage.  After a day or two it seemed better....but then while kicking a soccer ball around the backyard, I managed to miss the ball and slam the same knee...EXACT same spot of course...into the chain link fence around the family home.

I really should have had it seen about at that point, but never did.  Kinda fun every now and then though, as I can truthfully tell you when rain or inclement cold weather's on it's way.  Sucker will be so stiff I can hardly walk (coupling the injury now with increasing age).

2)  This is easily the funniest, looking back on it, but man did it mess with my pride.  The first job I ever worked out of college required you to traverse steps leading to a basement area where the computers were.  Put the metal tape on the reel, print out your change on the collection form, check it and take the tape back upstairs.

No, I didn't fall DOWN the stairs - I fell UP the things, right in front of my co-workers.

[ChadTower]

No, I didn't fall DOWN the stairs - I fell UP the things, right in front of my co-workers.

Everybody has done that at one point or another.  I did it carrying a baby.  Had to twist my whole body around to protect the baby and slammed my shoulder/head into the stairs hard.  Probably concussed myself (for about the 10th time).

The baby didn't even frown, thankfully.  If I hadn't been carrying a baby I would have just put a hand down and been fine.

[SirPeale]

I think we've all done something like that, Chad.

About three years ago we were going to my in-laws.  We stopped at a rest area.  I was carrying my son Riley.  I went to step over the curb (which was obscenely high - about a foot) and caught my toe.  Completely lost my balance.  Stumbled forward about ten feet, knew I was going to lose it, and didn't want to slam my kid on his head.  So I completely turned my body so I'd at least land on my side.  Hit my shoulder pretty hard.  Kid was fine.  Within seconds I had about 30 people around me, all wanting to know if the kid was okay.  Someone took him so I could catch my breath.  Wrenched my shoulder pretty hard, but nothing serious.

[saint]

Know a guy in JuJitsu class who was walking down the stairs holding his son. Tripped or lost his balance or some such, did the self-sacrifice thing to protect his kid, and broke his leg in 3 places. Ick. Ick.

[Jdurg]

I was getting out of Grand Central station and when I stepped onto one of the escalators down there I stepped in between two steps so when they started to raise I could either fall backward, or fall forward.  I figured falling forward would be less painful so I fell forward while trying not to drop my laptop bag and somehow not smacking my face onto the escalator steps.  Instead, my left hand got chewed up by the steps and after getting up and having everybody look at me stunned, I raced into work and dunked my hand in a huge cup of Listerine in the bathroom to disinfect it. 

Thankfully, no infection set it and the wounds healed just fine.

[stan2323]

I was about 9 years old and was out shooting frogs with my BB gun at a local pond.  It stopped shooing BBs.  I rolled up a bubble gum wrapper and put it in the end of the gun.  Pumped it up and shot it.  It came out just fine.  I tried shooting into the water to see if BBs were coming out.  No BB.  Well I proceeded to pump it up again and put none other than my finger in front of it.  Well it took the opportunity to start shooting again and I shot a BB right through my finger.  I went crying home to mom.  She put a band aid on it and said you’ll be OK run along and play.  She is an LPN and it is a good thing she is or I would have been going to the hospital every month or so.  I was always crashing my bike, falling out of the hay mound, cutting my self with knifes and saw. 

Severn months ago in July, now 34 years old, I was kicking dead branches off a pine tree at a house I just bought instead of cutting with a saw.  I kicked one hard at the wrong angel and it went through the bottom of my sneaker.  Put a hole in the bottom of my foot about ½ inch deep right in the middle of my arch.  I had to go to the hospital to have it cleaned out.  I felt so stupid explaining it to the doc.
 

[shardian]

I was about 9 years old and was out shooting frogs with my BB gun at a local pond.  It stopped shooing BBs.  I rolled up a bubble gum wrapper and put it in the end of the gun.  Pumped it up and shot it.  It came out just fine.  I tried shooting into the water to see if BBs were coming out.  No BB.  Well I proceeded to pump it up again and put none other than my finger in front of it.  Well it took the opportunity to start shooting again and I shot a BB right through my finger.  I went crying home to mom.  She put a band aid on it and said you’ll be OK run along and play.  She is an LPN and it is a good thing she is or I would have been going to the hospital every month or so.  I was always crashing my bike, falling out of the hay mound, cutting my self with knifes and saw.   

At least you only had a BB gun...

[shardian]

 

 

I think we can all amend our posts to show this.

[dstone]

I like fireworks. About two/three years ago, a few days before the 4th of July, my uncle brought home some time delay fuse as a gift from one of his friends that puts on the pro shows. Pretty simple stuff to use, you just cut off the length for the time delay you want and use some electrical tape to tape the fuses of the other fireworks. So, I cut off a length, lined up a series of 5 standard consumer-grade artillery shell tubes out in the field and tied them all together so they would shoot off in sequence. While I was doing this, my father and uncle were putting up some cedar inside the pool house, my mother was running back and forth getting nails and whatnot, and the rest of the family was in the pool. I let everyone know I was about to set off the fireworks and my mother came outside the fence that was around the pool to watch. I lit the fuse and ran to stand next to a tree that was alongside the pool fence. The first shell went off perfectly. Then I noticed I could see the fuse of the second shell burning down inside the tube. Uh-oh. I had barely gotten out "Oh cra-" when it went off, launching the second shell into the tree that my mother and I was standing under. We both take off running. The third shell launches into a perfect arc directly over the fence and into the pool, landing next to my grandfather. It exploded about 6-12 inches under water, sending a massive amount of water into the air. The fourth shell blew up another tree that I was standing under by that time, and the fifth shell blew up on the ground at the launch site. I turn around to see quite a bit of water running off the roof of the pool house and the house and my grandpa getting out of the pool laughing about how he thought he was back in the Navy. Needless to say, I don't use the cardboard launch tubes anymore. I have some nice steel pipes that get buried half-way in the ground and packed with sand bags. A little overkill, but I don't have to worry about the tubs flipping over anymore.

[ChadTower]

I turn around to see quite a bit of water running off the roof of the pool house and the house and my grandpa getting out of the pool laughing about how he thought he was back in the Navy.

Laughing?  My grandfather would have come around the fence and kicked ---my bottom--- for an hour.

[RayB]

I shot a BB gun at rubber tires. If anything guarantees a ricochet, it's gonna be thick rubber! Hit me in the very corner of an eye. Not enough to hurt or anything, but enough to make me realize how stupid I was being.

[ChadTower]

I shot a BB gun at rubber tires. If anything guarantees a ricochet, it's gonna be thick rubber! Hit me in the very corner of an eye. Not enough to hurt or anything, but enough to make me realize how stupid I was being.

I got a BB ricochet as a kid off of a tree I shot.  Hit me in the leg, with snow pants on, so all it did was make a loud slap.  Made me move back 15 feet, though.

[Franco B]

I dont seem to have much luck with cycles 

1) During the summer me and my friends used to have water fights at a friends house. After one battle we decided to go out on our bikes but couldnt be bothered to put our clothes back on as it was still hot so we just went out in our shorts. We started biking down a steep hill at the back of our friends house down a track between two fields with deep drainage ditches either side. Suddenly I hit a large rock hidden amoungst the tall grass and I was catupluted into one of the ditches straight into a huge deep nettle patch. I got stung from head to toe, I even managed to sting my tongue somehow! No amount of doc leaves would help in that situation.

2) Another time me and my friends were out on our cycles and i noticed that if I brushed my trainers against the spokes of my front wheel it made a nice tinkling noise. Pretty cool I thought but it was fairly quiet. I thought if I pressed my feet harder against the spokes it would make a louder noise. I tried this and needless to say my feet dug in between the spokes which were then dragged round the wheel before catapulting me straight onto my head, ouch! 

3) When we were little one of my friends got a transformers BMX that had a sound effects module on it that played various lazer noises controlled by a button on the handle bars. After much begging and pleading he let me have a go on it and we cycled round to my house on it. As I was biking towards the garage I thought I would go in at speed and pull a 'cool' skid. I cycled in at speed and becuase I had been playing with the sound effect unit I somehow got confused and mistaked the button for the back brake. Beep, beep, beep, beep, BANG! I crashed straight into the back of the garage wall.

4) A couple of years later I was biking towards my garage wearing a baseball cap. Unbeknown to me the garage door that swung down from the top was only 3/4 open and was infact perfectly at my head height. Somehow with my baseball cap on I didnt see the garage door and it clotheslined me clean off the bike.

I don't cycle much anymore!

[ark_ader]

Broke up with my "wife to be".

[emb]

I shot myself in the eye with a paintball gun. Back in high school a buddy of mine wanted to borrow one of my paintball guns. I let him borrow a cheap one of mine, since it was his first time. It was a pump-action talon (you could buy cheap these things for like $35) and it took those tiny co2 cartridges. He had his fun and gave it back the next day. He said the co2 tank was not in the gun. I was a complete moron and did not check (but did take off the hopper, but there still was a ball in the chamber).

So here I am cleaning out this gun. I turn the gun around, I lose grip of it, my hand slips and "magically" hits the trigger and *SMACK!* ....right in the eye!

My mother comes home from work and drives me to the hospital. They said if I came in any later I would probably have been blind. They put some stuff in my eye and gave me this eye-patch that looked like a metallic noodle strainer for a few weeks. I also remember seeing black "blobs" floating around my eye. I remember walking around the halls, and the kids from the middle school feared me because of that eye patch. Ahhh...great times....

[shardian]

I shot myself in the eye with a paintball gun. Back in high school a buddy of mine wanted to borrow one of my paintball guns. I let him borrow a cheap one of mine, since it was his first time. It was a pump-action talon (you could buy cheap these things for like $35) and it took those tiny co2 cartridges. He had his fun and gave it back the next day. He said the co2 tank was not in the gun. I was a complete moron and did not check (but did take off the hopper, but there still was a ball in the chamber).

So here I am cleaning out this gun. I turn the gun around, I lose grip of it, my hand slips and "magically" hits the trigger and *SMACK!* ....right in the eye!

My mother comes home from work and drives me to the hospital. They said if I came in any later I would probably have been blind. They put some stuff in my eye and gave me this eye-patch that looked like a metallic noodle strainer for a few weeks. I also remember seeing black "blobs" floating around my eye. I remember walking around the halls, and the kids from the middle school feared me because of that eye patch. Ahhh...great times....

At least you only had a paintball gun...
hehehe

I'm seeing a definite pattern, that arcade enthusiasts should not own guns.

[emb]

At least you only had a paintball gun...
hehehe

I'm seeing a definite pattern, that arcade enthusiasts should not own guns.

Are lightguns save?     

[shmokes]

Speaking of gun safety, my Con Law professor said something pretty hilarious today.  He pointed out that statistically the person most likely to murder you is your spouse.  He said that this is the reason he favors gun control.   

[shardian]

Speaking of gun safety, my Con Law professor said something pretty hilarious today.  He pointed out that statistically the person most likely to murder you is your spouse.  He said that this is the reason he favors gun control.   

Well then he should be against gun control. That way he can blow his spouses ass away and get away with it when she tries!

[RayB]

I also remember seeing black "blobs" floating around my eye.

How were those treated? I have "floaters" right now, but from all the research I've done, there is nothing that can be done about them.

[emb]

I also remember seeing black "blobs" floating around my eye.

How were those treated? I have "floaters" right now, but from all the research I've done, there is nothing that can be done about them.

I told the doctor that when I was in the emergency room. It was quite a few years ago, but if I remember correctly he said that it was my blood cells going through my retinal vasculature. He said that the "black blobs" would disappear over a few weeks (and they did).

[Kangum]

was pretty wasted after work one night. went to take a swig of beer and totally missed my mouth. smacked myself in the teeth with the beer bottle. cracked my front tooth in half. coordination was more then a little off that night. i still cant believe it happened. i must have tried to take a sip at warp speed to break it.

[Jdurg]

I also remember seeing black "blobs" floating around my eye.

How were those treated? I have "floaters" right now, but from all the research I've done, there is nothing that can be done about them.

Floaters occur when material such as blood cells, fluid, etc. is moving through the vitreous in your eye.  (Was at the eye doctor a few weeks ago and read up on this stuff).  They usually appear if a blood vessel starts leaking in your eye, or if you get some sudden head trauma and some cellular material detaches from your eye wall, you'll see the floaters.


Back on to dumb things.  Earlier this month I decided to pre-plan a payment on my Visa card so that I wouldn't forget.  I scheduled the payment online and forgot about it.  A few days ago, when I got my paycheck, I went and foolishly made another big payment on my card.  Oops!  I looked at my bank account today and nearly ---steaming pile of meadow muffin--- my pants when I saw how low it was.  I saw two payments to the credit card company and realized what I had done.  I immediately called the credit card company and they said "You have a balance of negative something something." They wouldn't refuse the payment, or send it back to my bank account.  All they could do was write me a check for the difference and I'd get it in 4-5 weeks.   

[emb]

Back on to dumb things.  Earlier this month I decided to pre-plan a payment on my Visa card so that I wouldn't forget.  I scheduled the payment online and forgot about it.  A few days ago, when I got my paycheck, I went and foolishly made another big payment on my card.  Oops!  I looked at my bank account today and nearly ---steaming pile of meadow muffin--- my pants when I saw how low it was.  I saw two payments to the credit card company and realized what I had done.  I immediately called the credit card company and they said "You have a balance of negative something something." They wouldn't refuse the payment, or send it back to my bank account.  All they could do was write me a check for the difference and I'd get it in 4-5 weeks.   

Ah man...that really sucks

[mountain]

Back on to dumb things.  Earlier this month I decided to pre-plan a payment on my Visa card so that I wouldn't forget.  I scheduled the payment online and forgot about it.  A few days ago, when I got my paycheck, I went and foolishly made another big payment on my card.  Oops!

I've done that too!

[shmokes]

This isn't something I did, but the fireworks story reminded me of it.  I was up at my in-law's cabin in Island Park, just outside Yellowstone.  We went to a professional 4th of July fireworks show that they have on the golf course up there every year (used to have, anyway )  I remember being really surprised they would do a fireworks show in the middle of a forest, but whatever.  Anyway, we're sitting there in our lawn chairs and such when the show starts.  A firework shoots up and explodes.  Pretty.  One or two more.  Nice.  Then something really strange happened.  The next explosion wasn't shaped like a circle.  It was a perfect half-circle . . . AT GROUND LEVEL    .   Immediately I said, "I don't think it was supposed to do that."  About the time that I said, ". . . that," every other firework set to be exploded that night, exploded.  On the ground.  At the same time.  It was ---smurfing--- amazing.  Seriously.   ---smurfing---.   Amazing.   I can't begin to describe how spectacular it was.

Once it was over there were a couple of trees engulfed in flames.  Luckily, and surprisingly, nobody was seriously injured.  Minor burns only.

[knave]

I was at a fireworks show once when a few of the rockets wond up hitting the ground before going off.  It was kind of neat but also a little scary.  For us they just went off in a field but a few degrees in another direction and it could have hit the crowd.

[dgordon86]

Next to my childhood house was a summer church (for tourists visiting our area, etc, etc). Well, it was on a hill  and was perfect for bike riding. So one day after not riding a bike for a couple years (probably about 13 at the time) I take my brother's bmx bike, which has no breaks and start to go as fast as I could humanly pedal down this hill. BIG mistake. I was going so fast I couldn't even bail when I realized was going non-stop! So I took it like a boy and slammed head on into the church, taking off a huge ass chunk of the  siding.  When I came to I couldn't even see straight (handles weren't straight either). So all cut and bruised I stumble home, and my mom thinks I'm faking. I finally convinced her when I told her I needed to take a nap.

Straight to triage.

Another time at that same setting, but a few years earlier I took a old style 80s skateboard (95'- I was about 9) and put a plywood board on the top to coast down. Didn't expect one of the wheels to come off...dragged my hand under the board for a few feet. infection, infection, infection. yum!

How about masterbating with soap and  not rinsing? that was pretty dumb. Balls flaked like there was no tomorrow! To be young again. lol. 

[javeryh]

Going to law school (instead of grad school for architecture) is by far dumbest thing I've ever done to myself.

[knave]

Going to law school (instead of grad school for architecture) is by far dumbest thing I've ever done to myself.

Well if we're gonna go there, I left a nice county job to go work for a tech company...then Crash!  Boy that sucked...I thought I was on the fast track to management when I ended up on unemployment. 

Now I have a different nice county job. 

[vorghagen]

How about masterbating with soap and  not rinsing? that was pretty dumb. Balls flaked like there was no tomorrow! To be young again. lol. 

Too. Much. Information.

Although, nice touch with the soapbox smiley.

[shmokes]

Going to law school (instead of grad school for architecture) is by far dumbest thing I've ever done to myself.

Ouch, that's a toughie.  I think being an architect would be a much more rewarding job than being a lawyer, in most situations.

[Thenasty]

Looking at this pic........... It hurt my eyes for a couple of days.....   


Had nightmares also 

[shmokes]

Jesus!  A couple days?  Why didn't you look away for Christ's sake?   

[javeryh]

Going to law school (instead of grad school for architecture) is by far dumbest thing I've ever done to myself.

Ouch, that's a toughie.  I think being an architect would be a much more rewarding job than being a lawyer, in most situations.

yeah, it's part of the reason I love building arcade machines and furniture and stuff - it's in my blood. 

[havic626]

while trying to clean out a auger, i slipped my finger in it while it was operating.  A small chunk of my pinky came off.   good times!!