um... Closer is obviously a love story.. not a sex movie. I'd even go so far as to label it a chick flick.. not many of those have hardcore sex scenes in it buddy. It was also a pretty good movie regardless of the lack of boobs.
Just because there is a hot girl in a film who happens to be a stripper or what not.. there doesnt HAVE TO BE naked scenes in it. If you had read reviews or summaries of it, you'd see pretty clearly that the chance of some hot Natalie Portman action was pretty slim.
Plus.. you do know the internet is full of porn right? You don't have to watch movies in the hope that you'll see a boob... you can find them in 2 seconds online.