Author Topic: Home Depot story I never want to experience! (Read 7150 times)

missioncontrol · « **Reply #40 on:** November 04, 2005, 03:20:00 pm »

Quote from: DarkKobold on November 04, 2005, 03:13:31 pm

What I can not figure out for the life of me is, with the American OCD culture the way it is, why have they not made self cleaning toilets? It seems like it would be simple to do.

then where would the illegals find work then?

ChadTower · « **Reply #41 on:** November 04, 2005, 03:22:53 pm »

Fixing automated toilet cleaners.

missioncontrol · « **Reply #42 on:** November 04, 2005, 03:30:29 pm »

Quote from: ChadTower on November 04, 2005, 03:22:53 pm

Fixing automated toilet cleaners.

missioncontrol slaps hand on forehead

of course what was I thing

DarkKobold · « **Reply #43 on:** November 04, 2005, 03:59:27 pm »

There will always be tasks that require illegal immigrants. Such as counting the number of posts that chad tower makes. You think that ---steaming pile of meadow muffin--- is automatic?

missioncontrol · « **Reply #44 on:** November 04, 2005, 04:03:51 pm »

Quote from: DarkKobold on November 04, 2005, 03:59:27 pm

Such as counting the number of posts that chad tower makes. You think that ---Cleveland steamer--- is automatic?

shhhh

if Saint finds out he can hire someone else to do that cheaper I'll be out of a job

Stingray · « **Reply #45 on:** November 04, 2005, 04:05:54 pm »

Quote from: missioncontrol on November 04, 2005, 04:03:51 pm

Quote from: DarkKobold on November 04, 2005, 03:59:27 pm
Such as counting the number of posts that chad tower makes. You think that ---Cleveland steamer--- is automatic?

shhhh

if Saint finds out he can hire someone else to do that cheaper I'll be out of a job

Nah, the real tragedy will be if you ever find out that Saint should be paying you with money instead of fried pickles.

-S

missioncontrol · « **Reply #46 on:** November 04, 2005, 04:07:16 pm »

but me likes fried pickels

ChadTower · « **Reply #47 on:** November 04, 2005, 04:07:23 pm »

His direct deposit of those pickles is a scary process.

Stingray · « **Reply #48 on:** November 04, 2005, 04:14:30 pm »

I request no further details.

-S

missioncontrol · « **Reply #49 on:** November 04, 2005, 04:15:20 pm »

eeewwwwwww

saint · « **Reply #50 on:** November 04, 2005, 07:03:51 pm »

You should see my vaseline bill . . .

Quote from: Stingray on November 04, 2005, 04:14:30 pm

I request no further details.

-S

DrewKaree · « **Reply #51 on:** November 04, 2005, 07:45:33 pm »

Quote from: shmokes on November 04, 2005, 02:37:46 am

Life is too short to worry about unimportant/inevitable unpleasantries.

I dunno. I think you'd be expressing a little consternation at being glued ass-first to a public restroom toilet seat. Of course, I'm just guessing. I could be wrong and you just simply refuse to let stuff like that get to you

Quote from: BrokenBones on November 04, 2005, 07:03:09 am

This problem can be easily solved by replacing your steering wheel with a toilet seat.

I had this mental image of Michael Knight's hands wrapped around a toilet seat in K.I.T.T.

Quote from: bosss7 on November 04, 2005, 09:25:51 am

Takes me that long to do the doo anyway.

The preferred term is "droppin' a deuce". Please make a note of it.

Quote from: Jabba on November 04, 2005, 11:20:38 am

I've heard of a lot of people keeling over dead from pushing too had while going for a dump.

I don't want to know the class of people you hang out with that go FOR a dump. Oh, and if/when we ever meet in RL, please know I WON'T be shaking your hand!

DrewKaree · « **Reply #52 on:** November 04, 2005, 07:49:43 pm »

Quote from: saint on November 04, 2005, 07:03:51 pm

You should see my vaseline bill . . .

missioncontrol · « **Reply #53 on:** November 04, 2005, 07:59:49 pm »

* missioncontrol attempts to get the thread bck on track

MORE BREAKING NEWS
http://kutv.com/watercooler/watercooler_story_308132654.html

-

DrewKaree · « **Reply #54 on:** November 04, 2005, 08:56:20 pm »

Quote from: missioncontrol on November 04, 2005, 07:59:49 pm

* missioncontrol attempts to get the thread bck on track

MORE BREAKING NEWS
http://kutv.com/watercooler/watercooler_story_308132654.html

Quote

"It was a pretty ugly moment," Dougherty said. "It's difficult to express terror."

Yeah, pretty difficult, since he can't crap himself.

The guy didn't deserve to get glued to a toilet seat, but like I said before, I can't believe there are people out there that DON'T look at the toilet seat in a public restroom before sitting down. Since it appears to be his standard operating procedure, how many times has he had pee-butt, and why is this something that Home Depot should be paying him anything more than the 2 grand they offered him?

The better question is:
How did he know he was speaking to a Home Depot employee, or that a Home Depot employee actually HEARD him, since OBVIOUSLY he wasn't able to get up and check for certain

missioncontrol · « **Reply #55 on:** November 04, 2005, 09:15:15 pm »

Quote

"The money issue aside, an apology would be nice," Dougherty said.

Quote

His attorney said Home Depot offered a settlement of $2,000.

Dougherty called it an insult.

missioncontrol · « **Reply #56 on:** November 04, 2005, 09:19:01 pm »

also notice the date of the incident

http://kutv.com/watercooler/watercooler_story_306215526.html

Quote

Bob Dougherty, 57, of Nederland, said he became stuck to a bathroom toilet seat on which somebody had smeared glue on Oct. 30, 2003, and felt "tremendous panic" when he realized he was stuck.

yet it's just now being reported

I tell you I think somethings fishy about this.....

DrewKaree · « **Reply #57 on:** November 04, 2005, 09:53:46 pm »

If we were talking aboot this happening in the women's bathroom, I'd say you're right

Jabba · « **Reply #58 on:** November 04, 2005, 10:07:14 pm »

Quote from: DrewKaree on November 04, 2005, 07:45:33 pm

I don't want to know the class of people you hang out with that go FOR a dump.

missioncontrol · « **Reply #59 on:** November 04, 2005, 10:45:39 pm »

What's the guy complaining about, It could have been worst

duffjr · « **Reply #60 on:** November 04, 2005, 11:11:10 pm »

how bad is having your ass peeled off compared to that?

duffjr · « **Reply #61 on:** November 04, 2005, 11:13:58 pm »

i was taking a piss with my friend when i saw someone i knew, so i shook his hand. my friend said he didn't shake his hand because he didn't wash.

ChadTower · « **Reply #62 on:** November 05, 2005, 02:23:15 pm »

George Thorogood says it best:

cause I piss alone
yeah, yeah, with nobody else
you know when I piss alone
I prefer to be by myself

ChadTower · « **Reply #63 on:** November 05, 2005, 02:29:24 pm »

After watching the guy talk, I'm convinced there is missing info. I bet someone smeared it on his ass while he was in the glue section, not on the toilet seat.

Or maybe the KY all over his ass from his rest stop romance solidified as he was sitting there, forming an adhesive bond to the toilet seat.

Either way, he needs to stop saying that being stuck on the toilet is a terrifying experience. Now, if the building is burning down, maybe, but there doesn't appear to have been much terror. I mean, seriously, dude is talking about how they had to put him on a stretcher and he was in extreme pain. Oooooooooookay, then.

Stingray · « **Reply #64 on:** November 07, 2005, 09:34:22 am »

Give me two grand and I'll be happy to glue my a$s to a toilet seat for you. Consider this an open offer.

-S

ChadTower · « **Reply #65 on:** November 07, 2005, 09:42:37 am »

After taxes, Stringray ends up with $76 and a free toilet seat.

Stingray · « **Reply #66 on:** November 07, 2005, 09:59:13 am »

Woo-Hoo! Free toilet seat!

-S

ChadTower · « **Reply #67 on:** November 07, 2005, 09:59:56 am »

Homer would approve of the toilet seat being permanently attached to your butt. It would make things simpler.

Goz · « **Reply #68 on:** November 07, 2005, 10:55:08 am »

If the guy wins and gets $$$ for gluing himself. Can you just imagine the disclaimers that will end up on toilet seats arround the world? Bad enough they have to put on the hot cup of coffee that it is hot. If they dont come out with disclaimers its just a matter of time before someone sues Levi's for not noting that the teeth on a zipper can castrate you.

ChadTower · « **Reply #69 on:** November 07, 2005, 11:03:33 am »

Someone needs to put a label on the zipper for toddler one piece footy jammies... THOSE are the zippers that can castrate.

CCM · « **Reply #70 on:** November 09, 2005, 09:58:46 am »

Apparently this guy has really bad luck in bathrooms..

http://www.cnn.com/2005/LAW/11/08/toilet.man.ap/index.html

Goz · « **Reply #71 on:** November 09, 2005, 10:05:03 am »

Quote from: CCM on November 09, 2005, 09:58:46 am

Apparently this guy has really bad luck in bathrooms..

http://www.cnn.com/2005/LAW/11/08/toilet.man.ap/index.html

Maybe his ass is made of glue....

Stingray · « **Reply #72 on:** November 09, 2005, 10:39:36 am »

He sweats superglue. It's the only explanation.

-S

missioncontrol · « **Reply #73 on:** November 09, 2005, 10:44:48 am »

Quote

The lawsuit claims he suffered pain, humiliation and financial loss. It seeks $3 million.

I'd glue myself to a toilet for half that.

I told you all you nay sayers it was a scam

ChadTower · « **Reply #74 on:** November 09, 2005, 10:46:03 am »

Quote

"It's not about the money. I want my health back. I want to be back to normal," Dougherty said. "I want to make sure this doesn't happen to anybody ever, ever again."

So, how does the money get him his health back?

And how exactly does some glue on your ass damage your overall health?

Dude, we all KNEW it was a scam.

missioncontrol · « **Reply #75 on:** November 09, 2005, 10:47:01 am »

sure you did

Dartful Dodger · « **Reply #76 on:** November 09, 2005, 12:02:30 pm »

Quote from: CCM on November 09, 2005, 09:58:46 am

Apparently this guy has really bad luck in bathrooms..

Stingray · « **Reply #77 on:** November 09, 2005, 12:11:43 pm »

Quote from: Dartful Dodger on November 09, 2005, 12:02:30 pm

...the guy didn't expect to be glued to a toilet...

-S

MameJunkie · « **Reply #78 on:** November 09, 2005, 12:15:30 pm »

The lawsuit claims he suffered pain, humiliation and financial loss. It seeks $3 million.

"It's not about the money. I want my health back. I want to be back to normal," Dougherty said

If its not about the money why the phuck sue for that much?

ChadTower · « **Reply #79 on:** November 09, 2005, 12:18:25 pm »

Yeah, he's such a good guy he thinks being glued to a toilet entitles him to three million dollars.


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