As it should be

[ChadTower]

While I type this, I am eating bacon.

[Stingray]

Me too as a matter of fact. Bacon cheeseburger to be specific.

-S

[M3talhead]

I have no bacon......

[ChadTower]

It was on  my cheeseburger.

[Sephroth57]

i went with the double whopper today, no bacon =(

[Stingray]

i went with the double whopper today, no bacon =(

Son, are we gonna have a problem here?

-S

[ChadTower]

Get your ass to the back of the line.

[Baker535]

Bacon Experts,

If you have bacon on a salad does that still count as proper consumption or is it considered to be void because of the semi-healthy context?

-baker

[ChadTower]

Context isn't important, authenticity is... thus, it only counts if it's a strip of bacon, not bacon bits.

Bacon bits are like an Ultracade.  They taste and smell like bacon but suck anyway.

[Stingray]

If you put bacon on a salad I think it would actually cause a tear in the fabric of reality. I don't really have a problem with that, but I thought you might want to know.

Note: Imitation bacon bits are not bacon. Real bacon bits are also not bacon, unles you reassemble them into a proper bacon strip shape. Anyone who cares to dispute this is more than welcome. Maybe we need a poll.

Edit: I see we have similarly strong feelings about bacon bits: the bastard bacon

-S

[ChadTower]

We do not need a poll.  We have an edict.  It is sufficient.

[Stingray]

Don't be like this guy:



Say no to bacon bits.

-S

[Baker535]

I have a theory that bacon bits were the failed attempt at creating beef jerky flavored Pop rocks when they were at height of their popularity... My sources are still waiting to confirm this, it is perilous mission I have sent them on. I expect many casualties.

-baker

[M3talhead]

I have a theory that bacon bits were the failed attempt at creating beef jerky flavored Pop rocks when they were at height of their popularity... My sources are still waiting to confirm this, it is perilous mission I have sent them on. I expect many casualties.

-baker

Funny, I always thought a bacon bit was a full size piece, minus the fat.

[Stingray]

I think it's entirely possible that you are both correct.

-S

[M3talhead]

I think it's entirely possible that you are both correct.

-S

Wait......listen...................you hear that??

I think its time/space ripping somewhere......

[Baker535]

I'm comfortable hearing time and space rip... anything else I hear ripping and I'll request a fan to be turned on...



Now, back on topic... should we replace 90% of the world's leaders with bacon. If so, will anyone even notice a difference?

-baker

[ChadTower]

Don't waste good bacon.

[Stingray]

Don't waste good bacon.

I second.

-S

[missioncontrol]

If you put bacon on a salad I think it would actually cause a tear in the fabric of reality. I don't really have a problem with that, but I thought you might want to know.

Note: Imitation bacon bits are not bacon. Real bacon bits are also not bacon, unles you reassemble them into a proper bacon strip shape. Anyone who cares to dispute this is more than welcome. Maybe we need a poll.

-S

I agree and disagree with you on this........

Yes Bacon Bits are the devil

But real Bacon broken up and put on a salad is perfectly o.k. this is one thing that I demand the wife do with my salad......

[Stingray]

BYO Bacon Bits. Please post a tutorial.

-S

[ChadTower]

But real Bacon broken up and put on a salad is perfectly o.k. this is one thing that I demand the wife do with my salad......

That would be why she puts on that red dress, those high heels, and goes out alone every friday night.

In fact, I'm picking her up at 8.  Tell her it's her turn to bring the syrup.

[missioncontrol]

BYO Bacon Bits

• send wife to store to get bacon and salad stuff
• stay at home and drink a beer
• tell wife to start making diner
• have another beer
• listen to sizzle from bacon cooking in kitchen
• go get another beer out of kitchen so that you can smell bacon cooking
• ask wife if it's ready yet
• return to computer
• yell to wife "hurry up I'm starving"
• wait approx. 10 minutes for wife to say dinner is ready
• get beer out of fridge and go to table
• eat salad with real bacon broken up on salad with dressing of your choice
• enjoy another beer for desert

[missioncontrol]

That would be why she puts on that red dress, those high heels, and goes out alone every friday night.

well she puts on the high heels and heads to the bedroom with me......

[ChadTower]

Breaking up good bacon is like spilling your beer and sucking it out of the carpet.

[missioncontrol]

Breaking up good bacon is like spilling your beer and sucking it out of the carpet.

so what are you saying? your acting like drinking spilled beer from the carpet is a bad thing........

[ChadTower]

I'm acting like it is less good than drinking it properly, as is tearing up a good strip of bacon and eating the bits.

[missioncontrol]

I'm all for drinking it properly, but if it spills you don't want it to go to waste so you got to improvise........

[Avery]

If it was a strip of bacon, but has been processed somehow - IE, chopped up for even bacon distribution - is that still acceptable?

(Ever notice that the non-pork based "bacon bits" look a lot like "Fruity Pebbles" with a bad case of melanoma?

[LPZ]

I wonder if there's bacon in heaven?

[ChadTower]

If there is no bacon, you cannot be in heaven by definition.

[DrewKaree]

Note: Imitation bacon bits are not bacon. Real bacon bits are also not bacon, unles you reassemble them into a proper bacon strip shape. Anyone who cares to dispute this is more than welcome. Maybe we need a poll.

Upon reading that, I got this mental image of you with a plate in front of you with large quantities of scotch tape to which are stuck numerous bits of bacon.

That image is funnier than anything I've seen here.........so far.



I tried missioncontrol's BYO Bacon Bits.  I have a question.

How can you tell if the bacon bits are done, since obviously you're going to have  hard time seeing through your swollen eyes, and if that don't stop you, your busted and rapidly swelling nose will block all future sight.

Oh, and the BYO cocktail needs more bacon grease added to the recipe.  Someone please have this fixed and flog the person who wrote up that disgusting (without bacon grease) concoction.

[missioncontrol]

[

I tried missioncontrol's BYO Bacon Bits. I have a question.

How can you tell if the bacon bits are done, since obviously you're going to have hard time seeing through your swollen eyes, and if that don't stop you, your busted and rapidly swelling nose will block all future sight.

you obviously never read my BYO training your wife manual 

[DrewKaree]

[

I tried missioncontrol's BYO Bacon Bits. I have a question.

How can you tell if the bacon bits are done, since obviously you're going to have hard time seeing through your swollen eyes, and if that don't stop you, your busted and rapidly swelling nose will block all future sight.

you obviously never read my BYO training your wife manual 

I was hit in the head with a book she said she got from the mailbox, but oddly, I never received the manual you said you sent to me

[SirPeale]

I don't have a problem with bacon bits, either from the jar or broken up bacon.  Bacos, OTOH...

[missioncontrol]

I was hit in the head with a book she said she got from the mailbox, but oddly, I never received the manual you said you sent to me

shhhhh

here you go:  Don't tell her I sent this

BYO Traing the Wife

right after the wife and I got married we got a dog......

The dog didn't listen I hit it with a rolled up newspaper in front of my wife and said, "That's one"

a few days latter the dog failed to listen again.......

<BANG> I shot it in front of my wife and said, "That's two"

a few days days after that my wife failed to listen, well then I rolled up a newspaper and hit her. I said, "That's one don't let there be a number two"

she's listened ever since................. 


 

[Stingray]

Upon reading that, I got this mental image of you with a plate in front of you with large quantities of scotch tape to which are stuck numerous bits of bacon.

That image is funnier than anything I've seen here.........so far.

I fail to see what's so funny about that.

-S

[ChadTower]

I am eating a bacon cheeseburger.

[M3talhead]

I am eating a bacon cheeseburger.

I'm drinking Guinness........oh....wait.......wrong thread......

[NIVO]

according to the laws of bacon:

....any food topped, steamed, boiled, fried, mashed, pureed, baked, or any other format made with bacon qualifies as an edible item. Any such food item not containing some form of bacon is deemed null and void and thus all warranties expressed are null and void.

[Stingray]

If I were eating a bacon cheeseburger & drinking a guiness I'd be phenominally happy right now. Alas, I'm still in my office.

-S

[Franco]

Now your talking!

[ChadTower]

I just sneezed and one of the sore muscles in my back spasmed.  I almost threw my laptop over the cube wall.  ---smurfing--- ouch.

[Franco]

ALERT!! The lowest of the low - imitation bacon bits!!



And on the subject of fake bacon, I give you.....

http://www.sillyjokes.co.uk/p-jokes/fake/bacon.html

[Stingray]

My wife is a vegetarian. Occasionally she tries to feed me this foul crap. It's like Satan in a box. Speaking of boxes, the one the stuff comes in probably tastes more like bacon than the product does. The person who invented it should be  boiled in pork fat.

-S

[ChadTower]

That just ain't right.

[M3talhead]

What are everyone's thoughts on turkey bacon?

[ChadTower]

It could be worse.  Look at what Stingray's wife inflicts on him.

[Stingray]

That just ain't right.

I think that's what I said the first time I tasted the stuff. I may have thrown in a couple of auto censoreds.

-S

[ChadTower]

I hope for your sake she covers her other wifely duties... vegetarian AND fake bacon is pretty difficult to compensate for.

[Stingray]

She does very well in all other areas. She even thinks my arcade machines are pretty cool.

-S

[ChadTower]

Happiting on the Arcadeist makes up for the vegetaristink.

Sine yo pitty onna runny kine.

[Stingray]

In alsoness, the fulfilment of the boudoirie-type obligationments are being excecuteedest with most goodly excellentification.

-S

[ChadTower]

Excellition.

[DrewKaree]

I am eating a bacon cheeseburger.

I'm drinking Guinness........oh....wait.......wrong thread......

I had both yesterday.  And not in the bottles like you had.  Straight from the tap - bringing the thread topic in.  As it should be.

That fake bacon pic looks like a big meaty gross ---meecrob--- bag.  You should be removed from this thread for conduct unbecoming a member of the bacon-loving community.  At the very least, you should be forced to eat that turd raw with only a piss-warm Blatz to wash it down.     Wati'll I have shmokes smite you....you are IN for it now, mister!

[ChadTower]

shmokes is all bark.  His bite is softer than Ricky Martin getting a lapdance from Jessica Simpson.

[ChadTower]

I am eating bacon.

I envision this thread as the place we report our bacon eating.  A place to brag that I am eating bacon right now are you are not.

[Stingray]

So am I. Again, bacon cheeseburger. Obviously we have lunch at the same time.

-S

[ChadTower]

Well, this is my 45 minute break.  I'm teaching an internal class on state transition workflow design today.  My back has not completely healed and is killing me from standing by the whiteboard and projector screen, the ibuprofen is giving me massive heartburn, and I hate teaching internal classes.

I usually eat lunch at about noon.

[Stingray]

Sonic has an outstanding bacon, egg & cheese sandwich on Texas toast.

By the way, I'm eating bacon right now and you're not.

-S

[Zakk]

Why do I have this mental image of a whole bunch of greasy fat-a$$es sitting in front of their computers, eating fist fulls of bacon and arguing which star trek episode was worst?

Sweet jesus people, get a grip on yourselves!

[Stingray]

Posting a picture of tofu is enough to induce a lynching 'round these parts.

-S

[Zakk]

(send me your bacon and I'll stop!)

[ChadTower]

I like tofu, my kids like tofu.  We eat it probably once a week on average.

[Zakk]

I don't even know what it is.  It looks like cheese to me!  Chinese cheese? (oooh, say that 10 times) Chinese cheese chinese cheese chinese cheese...

[ChadTower]

Made from soy, tasteless on its own but absorbs the taste of whatever you cook it with.  It's nearly pure protein.

[Stingray]

Interestingly, no matter how it's prepared it tastes like overcooked chemical pudding to me.

-S

[ChadTower]

There are a lot of things that if cooked badly can be gross, but most if not all of them are excellent when done right.

[Sephroth57]

i enjoyed bacon at 1am last night, i came back from AC kinda pissy cause i lost 200$ (blah dont start, im still up =P )   and i called my woman and im like im coming over and i need food, so she made french toast and bacon at 1am. nothing like bacon in the middle of the night

[ChadTower]

Lunch:  steak and cheese sub.. with bacon.

This rules.

[Stingray]

I had lasagna. No bacon, but it was pretty heavily laden with sausage, which is fairly close I suppose. In any case it was outstanding and the boss paid for it.

-S

[ChadTower]

Your boss paid for you to get the heavy sausage.

[psik0tik]

Im having bacon and I havent watered it down with a sammich or some other additive...Im eating pure unadulterated bacon...And if vegatables had to take a crap..tofu would come out

[Stingray]

Your boss paid for you to get the heavy sausage.

It's true. I'm a real pork whore.

-S

[M3talhead]

Well fellas, I've got about a hour until its Guinness time!!

MMMMMmmmmmm.......frosty....

[Stingray]

Ah beer. The solution to, and the cause of, all of life's problems.

-S

[Sephroth57]

i should drink tonight, i feel depressed today. i hate dreams

[ChadTower]

Beer is both a giver and a taker.  It makes men fat at the same time it makes women look better.

[Stingray]

Beer is both a giver and a taker.  It makes men fat at the same time it makes women look better.

Sounds like a win-win to me.

-S

[ChadTower]

It would be, if the fat man could get the woman.  Alas, the second the woman gets wind that you think she's attractive, she wants someone else.  That's female nature.

Of course, even if you get her, eventually you sober up and see that she looks like Don Rumsfeld.

[shmokes]

shmokes is all bark.

As opposed to all the other gods who prefer to deal up-front and face-to-face?  How's your back coming along, by the way?

[ChadTower]

How's your back coming along, by the way?

I'll know exactly tomorrow after my MRI.  As of now I'm just trying to rebuild the balance of strength and flexibility that was lost by the injury and following bed rest.  I was shocked at how much atrophy and loss of cardiovascular conditioning one can experience in two weeks of mostly bed rest.

[shmokes]

It's all part of my plan.

mwahahahahaHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

[ChadTower]

Even with the bad back I'm likely stronger, faster, and in better condition than most people here.   

[M3talhead]

Even with the bad back I'm likely stronger, faster, and in better condition than most people here.   

We can rebuild him.....we have the technology.......

[Stingray]

We can rebuild him.....we have the technology.......

I have four rubber bands, a paperclip, and a broken happs super I'm willing to contribute to the project.

-S

[ChadTower]

You guys would rebuild me out of bacon.

[Stingray]

If only I had a photo of you to use as the basis for one of my photoshop/ bacon masterpieces.

-S

[M3talhead]

We can rebuild him.....we have the technology.......

I have four rubber bands, a paperclip, and a broken happs super I'm willing to contribute to the project.

-S

I have about 8 feet of speaker wire, a new starter motor for a '99 Chevy S-10, and a half-bottle of Jack Daniels. What else do we need?

[Stingray]

We can rebuild him.....we have the technology.......

I have four rubber bands, a paperclip, and a broken happs super I'm willing to contribute to the project.

-S

I have about 8 feet of speaker wire, a new starter motor for a '99 Chevy S-10, and a half-bottle of Jack Daniels. What else do we need?

1.21 gigwatts of electricity, a flux capacitor, and probably permission from a few state and local authorities.

-S

[TheVengeance]

Even with the bad back I'm likely stronger, faster, and in better condition than most people here.

[ChadTower]

Heh.  That pic is a few years old. 

Though I do still love the Jagr.

[TheVengeance]

Heh.

[ChadTower]

Note the frost all over the bottle.  That is how it is meant to be.

You'd be smiling like that too if you had a frosty bottle of Jagr in your hand.

[TheVengeance]

Note the frost all over the bottle.

[Stingray]

Is that really you Chad? Man, you look wasted. And I agree, frosty is the only way to drink Jager.

[shmokes]

I've had a bottle of jagr in my freezer for years.  That stuff is nasty.  It tastes like nyquil. 

[Stingray]

I've had a bottle of jagr in my freezer for years.  That stuff is nasty.  It tastes like nyquil. 

If Nyquil came in black liquorice flavor, I'd say you're right. Besides, BYOAC EE has a long and proud history of Nyquil drinkers.

-S

[mr.Curmudgeon]

Even with the bad back I'm likely stronger, faster, and in better condition than most people here.   

Lord knows with all the time spent on this forum, you must have built up quite the physique!   

mrC

[ChadTower]

Is that really you Chad? Man, you look wasted. And I agree, frosty is the only way to drink Jager.

Dude, I was hanging out with a bottle of frosty Jagr.

[TheVengeance]

Is that really you Chad? Man, you look wasted. And I agree, frosty is the only way to drink Jager.

Dude, I was hanging out with a bottle of frosty Jagr.

[Bacon]

Anyone need any Bacon?

[ChadTower]

Do you still have that beard?

I have a slightly larger beard now and my hair is close to shoulder length, actually.

[Stingray]

The secret's out, Chad's another long haired hippy!

-S

[shmokes]

Original Nyquil flavor does taste like liquorice.  Though, it tastes more like jagr than liquorice.

[ChadTower]

Dude, who drinks something like Jagr for the taste?  Only a sissy would sit there and sip on Jagr.

[Clonedsheep]

Ever try Uzo? It tastes like black liquorice. It's Greek and I love the stuff. I really can't drink too much Jagr.

[ChadTower]

I may have seen Uzo but I know I've never tried it.

I need to find a good bottle of Absinthe.  I used to love that stuff.

Well, I hated it the day after, usually.

[shmokes]

Dude, who drinks something like Jagr for the taste?  Only a sissy would sit there and sip on Jagr.

A sissy?  LMAO.  It's liquorice schnapps for crying out loud.  Jagr is the b1tch beer of shooters.  Shoot some tequila or whiskey or vodka.  Hell, Captain Morgan is more hardcore than jagr.  Parot Bay is more like it.

[Stingray]

I don't know man, Jager has a helluva kick to it.

-S

[Clonedsheep]

http://www.absinthe.bz/

[Stingray]

they also sell Cannabis Vodka. I am curious.

Be sure to report back with your findings.

-S

[Bacon]

Is Jagr like Schnapps? My Uncle lives in Germany and when he comes over he brings a couple of biottles of this stuff. Freeze it in ine Freezer, some tasty Bacon, a few shots and your feeling Groovy!

[ChadTower]

A sissy?

[ChadTower]

http://www.absinthe.bz/

[shmokes]

Can you even have absinth shipped here?  It's still illegal isn't it?  My brother in law brought some back from Russia and I tried it.  I don't know if it was crappy absinth, but it tasted awful.

On jagr, I don't know.  To each his own, I guess.  For me, it's not about being hardcore, it's about not particularly wanting to end up over the toilet. 

[ChadTower]

Can you even have absinth shipped here?

[Clonedsheep]

Can you even have absinth shipped here? It's still illegal isn't it? My brother in law brought some back from Russia and I tried it. I don't know if it was crappy absinth, but it tasted awful.

On jagr, I don't know. To each his own, I guess. For me, it's not about being hardcore, it's about not particularly wanting to end up over the toilet.

Did you do the sugarcube in the spoon bit before drinking it? I don't know the details but the sugar is supposed to help.

[ChadTower]

Absinthe does taste a bit crappy, but after a few shots, when you start to understand A Cask of Amontillado and conclude it is a reasonable way to think... you've got a good Absinthe ride going.

[shmokes]

LMAO

For the love of God, Montresor!"

"Yes...for the love of God!"

[ChadTower]

Let's put it this way... Poe:  absinthe addict, absinthed himself to an early death.  Van Gogh:  Absinthe addict, led him to think cutting off his ear and sending it to his gf was romantic. 

Many, if not most, of the greatest European writers and artists of the last milennia were regular absinthe users.

It was Europe's opium.

[shmokes]

I read that absent anything like an FDA, bad batches of absinth were quite common and that Van Gogh was more than likely poisoned by a bad batch rather than severely intoxicated when he cut off his ear lobe.  Still, funny as hell.

[ChadTower]

That could easily be true.  He could also have been a total jerkwad before he picked up a bottle.

[Clonedsheep]

Yeah wierd stories like the Van Gogh one keep me from really checking it out. I also was curious about salvia divinorum.  Even though they are both legal right now.

[shmokes]

Stories like Lorena Bobbit make me hesitant to check any alcohol out. 

But, if it's true about it being poisonous from being made in someone's basement in rusty containers (or something like that) then you wouldn't have to worry now, as it has to go through the country's FDA (or whatever other countries call it) before it can hit the market.

[ChadTower]

I am eating a bacon cheeseburger with bbq sauce.   

[Stingray]

Looks like you beat me to lunch today. Ten more minutes for me.

Mmm... bacon cheeeeeseburger...

-S

[Sephroth57]

i went with roast beef today, which is ALMOST as good as bacon

[ChadTower]

You should have added bacon.  We are disappointed.

[DrewKaree]

Even with the bad back I'm likely stronger, faster, and in better condition than most people here.   

We can rebuild him.....we have the technology.......

I've got just the thing.  Who wants to be the alien in this scenario, though?

[DrewKaree]

I've had a bottle of jagr in my freezer for years.  That stuff is nasty.  It tastes like nyquil. 

It's Vicks Formula 44.  The old-fashioned stuff before they started coming out with all the sissy flavors and additives for other crap.  Oddly enough, it was also the same color as Jager.

[ChadTower]

That was one of the major banned substances that our Guidance Counselors used to lecture us about.

Stingray, get 'im.

[Stingray]

Don't look at me. I think it's endlessly amusing when people O.D. on over-the-counter medications.

-S

[psik0tik]

Nyquil is still the king....anything that tastes just like the color it is has to be the best.

[ChadTower]

<too many jokes... can't decide on one...>

[Stingray]

Sometimes it's just so easy that all of the fun is sapped out of the joke anyway.

-S

[ChadTower]

Dinner:  Open faced hot turkey sandwich, gravy and stuffing... with bacon in the sandwich.

[ChadTower]

Lunch:

[Stingray]

You're having lunch early today. I'll report in later.

-S

[Stingray]

Arby's Chicken, Bacon & Swiss. The bacon was a bit soggy, but I suppose that soggy bacon is better than no bacon.

-S

[shmokes]

Dinner: Grilled chicken breast with an apricot dip, corn, a peach.

Breakfast:  English Muffin, Earl Grey, Breakfast Burrito with egg, potatoes, onions and bell peppers.

Lunch: Two peanut butter/jam sandwiches.  Bottle of water.

Sorry.  Bacon tastes fine, though, I guess.  I sometimes have it when I order breakfast at restaurants or on the occasional club or blt. 

[Stingray]

Okay shmokes, you have until the count of ten to put on your flame resitant underoos.

1... 2... 3... 45678910!



-S

[shmokes]

Oh yeah....I forgot to mention pistachios.  I eat pistachios like they were going out of style.

And thanks to Stingray's warning ---my bottom--- still looks like ivory.

[ChadTower]

Seriously, dude missed the whole point to this thread.  This thread is not for reporting meals.  This thread is for reporting bacon.

If you do not have bacon on your plate you do not belong here.

[shmokes]

....but.....I eat so little bacon     

[ChadTower]

So why would you want to be here, then?  If you're not a bacon lover, why try to insert yourself into a bacon lovers' forum?

Start an apricot dip thread!

Seriously... you came into a bacon lovers' thread and started talking about apricot dip and earl grey tea.  You're lucky you don't have pork products hanging out your rear end.   

[Stingray]

....but.....I eat so little bacon     

I guess that makes you a sneech with no star.

-S

[ChadTower]

Sneeches and spunkles and big haired Garfunkels.

[Stingray]

Clearly it's Seuss week here on BYOAC.

-S

[shmokes]

 You're lucky you don't have pork products hanging out your rear end. 

And here I thought this was just because I hadn't eaten any in a while.

[ChadTower]

No no no - too much pork products equal explosion, not retention.

Too many political threads equals retention.

[Stingray]

Too many political threads equals retention.

Followed by explosion.

-S

[ChadTower]

Unfortunately, that explosion comes via the keyboard and not the anus.  The anal explosion would have more useful content.

[Stingray]

I hate to disagree with you Chad, but most of the political threads get pretty anal pretty quickly.

-S

[ChadTower]

You must agree that a literal anal explosion produces more useful content than a political thread.

[psik0tik]

an anal explosion would produce more content purely on the fact of who we are...youd much rather gravitate twords "Yeah my anus exploded" then you would "bush blah blah blah"

[ChadTower]

A reasonable person would.  Alas, some posters around here respond to anything with Bush blah blah blah...

[Stingray]

Well I don't know, I can see how someone would naturally think of Bush when confronted with the contents of an exploded anus.

-S

[ChadTower]

This morning on the radio, people were blaming Bush directly for the hurricane.

[Stingray]

I suspected that he might be involved.

-S

[ChadTower]

Steak and cheese... with bacon.

[Stingray]

BLT sounds pretty good. Now where can I get a BLT that's close to here?

-S

[ChadTower]

The problem with a BLT is the L and the T.

[shmokes]

Considering his ability to have direct discourse with the lord almighty it might not be the stretch you imagine.

[ChadTower]

Now, how could a talk with Tom Brady cause a hurricane?

[DrewKaree]

Breakfast

Sausage McMuffin with egg, traded out the sausage for bacon
Bacon Mc Griddle

Lunch, about to bite into a Jr Bacon Cheeseburger x 2

For dinner, I may just pull the trifecta and have a pound of bacon and a beer to wash it down.

[ChadTower]

Dude, you must weigh about 400lb if that is a usual day of food.

[Stingray]

I lose this game today. I went out in search of a BLT, but came back with fish & chips.

-S

[DrewKaree]

Dude, you must weigh about 400lb if that is a usual day of food.

I always eat a big breakfast.  Seems I'm WAY less hungry throughout the day whenever I do it.  And that's all I had too.  No fries, I'm really particular about 'em, and unless I'm starving, I'll pass on 'em usually.  That's 2 Jr bacon cheeseburgers (Wendy's).  Water.  Lunch. 

Did you eat less than ME for lunch? 

I do landscaping in the summer too.  It helps to keep me below 400, otherwise you'd be correct.  As it is, I lose a bunch in summer and gain it back in winter.  I'm like a bear in reverse.

[ChadTower]

Today, I ate a big lunch, but I have football practice today.  Normally my lunch is something like a cheeseburger and a fruit smoothie, or some orange chicken and white rice with diet soda.

Though, with the way the ibuprofen has been wracking my stomach over the past couple of weeks, I've been eating less healthy stuff to try and make my stomach feel better.  There's a bit of irony in there someplace.

[shmokes]

I just got a phone call from one of my users who said:

Julie:  "Jake, I was wondering if you could come fix my database (MS Access).  I totally messed it up.  I was trying to make changes to the backend.  When Stephanie (SQL expert, database manager) made changes to it on my old computer she would go into the Linked Table Manager but when I went to Options, Database Tools, Linked Table Manager on my new computer it said that the feature wasn't installed, so I just copied and pasted the table over the top of the other one.  Now all the relationships are gone."

shmokes:  "Why are you trying to make changes to the backend of the database?  Why didn't you contact Stephanie?"

Julie:  "Well, I thought I knew how to do it."


Does anyone know how to make bacon, and would anybody be interested in some human bacon?

[DrewKaree]

Today, I ate a big lunch, but I have football practice today.  Normally my lunch is something like a cheeseburger and a fruit smoothie, or some orange chicken and white rice with diet soda.

Though, with the way the ibuprofen has been wracking my stomach over the past couple of weeks, I've been eating less healthy stuff to try and make my stomach feel better.  There's a bit of irony in there someplace.

Try a few spicy things to help get those juices flowing and eat up that tablet quick-like. 

[ChadTower]

Nah, large amounts of ibuprofen are known to cause stomach problems in many people.  Not much I can do about it if I want to be on ibuprofen.

[shmokes]

Be on tylenol for a while.  Make your kidneys take some of the pain.

[ChadTower]

On wednesday, I had a big setback with my back.  Thursday I was in so much pain I could barely breathe, nevermind roll over in bed.  Friday I went to the doctor, with much effort, and told him the ibuprofen is uncool.  He upped the ante to Vicodin.

Also, over the past few days, while in the most pain I have ever experienced, I ate some bacon.

[Stingray]

I ate some bacon.

Probably did you more good than the vicodin.

-S

[ChadTower]

I haven't actually taken any of the vicodin.  I got it too late to be of use when I really needed it, and I'm saving it for another day like that one.  I have a high pain tolerance, so when I get to the point that I'm asking for the vicodin, it's because the pain is bad enough that it is crippling me.  That's how bad it was thursday.  I was lying on the bed having trouble breathing.  It subsided a good amount friday, and again Saturday, and now it's down to a dull ache in several areas.

[Sephroth57]

sounds kinky

[ChadTower]

Trust me, it wasn't.

Back injuries suck.  You can't even slam the salami, your back spasms.

[Stingray]

I agree that sever back pain is no picnic. I've had back problems for almost ten years (car wreck) off and on. When it gets bad enough that I need prescription meds I tend to hoard them for a really bad day too.

-S

[ChadTower]

The MRI showed a small herniation between L4 and L5 on the left side, with two annular tears in the same spot.

Crappy.

[Sephroth57]

figure out a way to sue someone for it

[ChadTower]

Hrm.  I wonder who is responsible for this gravity thing the doctors keep talking about.

[Sephroth57]

somehow its either a black persons fault, or bush. pick one

[Stingray]

I have what was described to me as a sever herniation. The doctors wanted to operate and fuse some bones in my back, there were a bunch of pins and screws involved prominantly in this plan. It also involved cutting me open from the front, pulling out all of the important gooshy bits inside me and then putting all of said gooshy bits back in after they were finished. This was proposed to me by a man who couldn't manage to keep track of his appointment book. I passed.

-S

[ChadTower]

Yet you did not find better doctors, I take it.

[Stingray]

Well, I do admit that the plan sounded scary enough that I was not interested regardless of who did the operation. Mostly I'm just a coward. What else is new?

Seriously, my back doesn't bother me very often these days, although sometimes it does. The docs told me there was an outside chance that it would heal by itself over time. I guess I got lucky.

-S

[ChadTower]

Yeah, but if you wanted to, oh, say take up mountain biking... could you?

[Stingray]

Actually my wife and I own mountain bikes that we take out fairly regularly in nice weather. Now I'm talking very tame city park trails, and not hard core off road stuff, but most of the time my back feels good enough that biking is not out of the question. We play tennis pretty often too, which I find to be harder on my back than biking, but most of the time it's not an issue.

-S

[ChadTower]

Right.  At this point, I'm being told no more semipro football or other high contact sports.  Different level of restriction, though I may become a kicke to get back onto the field.  Once I recover the lost strength and balance in my torso, I should be fine.

[Stingray]

Well I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt that football (other than flag football anyway) would be completely out of the question for me.

-S

[ChadTower]

Eh, I tried flag football.  Every time I hit someone I got a flag.

[ChadTower]

Bacon and sausage pizza.

[ChadTower]

Grilled cheese with bacon.  I am eating it right now.

[c64rulez]

Just switch cheeseburger with cheesecake

[Harry Potter]

Cheeseburger. Better than (new word for the autocensor) Furburger?

[ChadTower]

WTF are you doing?  Do not combine the bacon and the cheesecake.  They are separate for a reason.  You don't mix fire and water, do you?

[Harry Potter]

Not if the fire is on Chad. 

[ChadTower]

BURN.

[c64rulez]

Not if the fire is on Chad.

1:0

[missioncontrol]

c64.............


your back 

[c64rulez]

Its nice and cozy

[nostrebor]

C64 must make a post about bacon immediately! No derailing the BACON POST!!!

[Luxury]

Speaking of bacon - You shoulda seen the stuff my Dad had at his house over Christmas.  I forget the name but it was something like "Tom's Fat Bacon".  And it was.  I would say it was about half an inch thick and ~99% fat.  The things looked like a thick porkchop.  I like bacon a lot (hence why I first joined BYOAC in the first place - to talk about my love for bacon), but this stuff was just nasty.  I wish I had taken a picture.

[c64rulez]

C64 must make a post about bacon immediately! No derailing the BACON POST!!!

Sorry guys, but...


























Bacon SUCKS!!!

Any decent carnivore knows that. Please refine your taste.

[Harry Potter]

C64 must make a post about bacon immediately! No derailing the BACON POST!!!

Sorry guys, but...


























Bacon SUCKS!!!

Any decent carnivore knows that. Please refine your taste.

Pigs are filthy animals.

I'd rather eat dog

[markrvp]

Yes, roasted dog is good.

[nostrebor]

I'm having ---Roasted Dog--- right now.

It just doesn't quite have that ---Brussels Sprouts--- feel to it

[markrvp]

Would "roasted dog" be one of those funny sayings out of context?