I bend BOTH leaves at the base.
On the 4-ways, you have to be really careful not to get them too tight, or they quit being 4-ways and become 8-ways.
You want them set so that they contact as near as possible to center, but not so close that you can hit diagonals.
It takes a bit of round-and-round adjusting to get them just right, and you need to tweak them every now and then to keep them functioning at peak efficiency.
When they are perfect, you'll see the one leaf just break contact as the next makes contact--all the way around.
The 8-ways are easier in that you just need to find a good balance for how much of the perimeter travel needs to be a diagonal.
If you get them too tight, the diagonals will take up too much of the pie as you go around the outside.
Too loose, and they will take up too little.
Your goal should be to get eight equal sections as the stick goes around the perimeter of its travel.
There are games that you may want to tweak a stick for as well.
Crazy Climber is one of these.
It plays best with a stick that requires almost no travel Up/Down to contact, but considerable travel Left/Right.
That allows you to have more "on" time as you are climbing straight, but keeps you from accidentally hitting diagonals.