I'm thinking there is plenty of opportunity here to really have some fun with this. I can appreciate you are busy, but it's not fair to hog all the fun for yourself.
Perhaps you could tell him that in the modern age the best thing for him to do is to contact the company president support office directly through the internet. At this site:
http://forum.arcadecontrols.com/index.php/board,6.0.htmlExplain to him that he'll have to register himself first but it's well worth it because there are hundreds of highly qualified staff members online 24 hours per day which could surely help him through these problems. You might want to mention that if he is truly dissatisfied with your performance he should specifically elaborate how you "Chad Tower" could improve!
After all everyone here at "CVS Corporate headquarters in Rhode Island" wants nothing less than 100% total customer satisfaction....
Respectfully,
John Jacob Jinglehimershmidt
Public Relations Manager
CVS Corporate Headquarters
Rental Property Management Division