1 + 2) The 4 way and its buttons should be wired to p1 and only p1. In 2 player alternating games, both players use p1 controls. There is really no reason to double up wiring anyway. You could remap p1 and p2 to be the same keys in MAME if you really wanted to.
3) The coin door uses microswitches just like any other control. Connecting it to the ipac is no problem.
4) Let's do the math.
12 buttons - p1 (includes 8way, 6 buttons, start, coin, 4way, and 3 buttons for 4way)
12 buttons - p2 (includes 8way, 6 buttons, start, coin)
2 buttons - pause and exit
TOTAL:
26
The Ipac2 has 28 inputs so you are good to go.