Wheel profiles not coming up is a pain, and in my case it was just configuration issues in the frontend, things like time-to-run and more. I've had to use programs like autohotkey and other scripts. So, you trigger a game in the frontend, which actually launches an AHK exe that closes the front end and open the game, waits until the game window is no longer active (i/e tyhe game closes) then opens the frontend again.
Another thing you could try is using the frontend to launch default MAME and from the MAME menu's try to figure out what settings are active when you launch games?
It really sounds like a frontend question though. Do other games without force-feedback work as they should through the front end? Can you fake that to test it, if you need to? Have you tried asking on the bigbox FE site, or wherever that community is?