The controls are easy -- do the following in the Input (this Game) menu for each button in turn:
- Press Enter
- Press Esc (changes to "none")
- Press Enter
- Press P1 button (changes to P1 button)
- Press Enter
- Press P2 button (changes to P1 button
or P2 button)
The video doesn't appear to be working on my setup either -- IIRC I'm using .LAY/art files from Mr. Do's.
In "Cocktail" video mode, it is upside-down on the top half of the screen with no flipping/repositioning during a 2P game.
In "Cocktail Art" video mode, it is upright in the middle of a rendered wood-grain cocktail table with no flipping/repositioning during a 2P game.

Scott
EDIT: Paige found the answer.
Asteroids boards know if they are in a cocktail or upright cabinet because of a pin that is grounded on the cocktail harness but not on the upright.
Unfortunately this does not seem to be in Mame. 