well, solenoids are what a real pinball machine uses, you just get a little thunk as you press the button,
some people use industrial relays, but solenoids are cheaper, just be sure to use a quenching diode on the solenoid, otherwise the first time you press the button and release it, the back emf will blow the crap out of what ever input board you use (minipac/key whizz etc)
for the ball shooter thing, pretty easy to get a real pinball plunger assembly, and have a microswitch at the end for it to hit when released, tho to be honnest it wont be that realistic,
with a real pinball machine the plunger controls the rate at which the ball is fired, some skill shots require good plunger control,
there was an electronic plunger i read about that used a g-force sensor or similar to sense how far you'd pulled it out and sent the correct signal to the game, but that relies on the version of virtual pinball you use being able to use the info.
modern pinball machines dont use mechanical plungers, it's a button, or a gun trigger to launch the ball and control some in game features,
you do get a little thunk as the auto launch solenoid fires, but it's not as much as you think, and most people go way over the top with mame machines... thinking a mini earth tremmor is what you get when you press the flipper buttons,
of course if you emulating flipper knocks, you need to add the free game knocker solenoid, the pop bumper solenoids, sling shots, kickers etc,
to be honnest, a good sub on the sound system should re-produce most of the feeling of a real pinball game,