ATM Proceedure

[ratzz]

MALE PROCEDURE:

   1. Drive up to the cash machine.
   2. Put down your car window.
   3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
   4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
   5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
   6. Put window up.
   7. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

   1. Drive up to cash machine.
   2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
   3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
   4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
   5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up
   6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
   7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
   8. Insert card.
   9. Re-insert card the right way.
  10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
  11. Enter PIN.
  12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
  13. Enter amount of cash required.
  14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
  15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
  16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
  17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
  18. Re-check makeup.
  19. Drive forward 2 feet.
  20. Reverse back to cash machine.
  21. Retrieve card.
  22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.
  23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
  24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
  25. Redial person on cell phone.
  26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
  27. Release Parking Brake.

Yep, I know its an old one, but I love it!

[ark_ader]

How about this one?

Drive up to the teller window via Drive Thu.  Use those vacuum tube thingies, put in your debit card and ID.

Ask for some cash.

Teller says "Check please".

I say use debit card.

Teller Says "Check is needed".

Teller says "use ATM".


So you need a check to withdraw from a bank, where you can go into any other bank and use your debit card. 

Why?   

[Ed_McCarron]

I'm still trying to figure out why they charge to use an ATM when you are saving labor costs by avoiding the teller.

Is it true that other countries charge a surcharge to see a teller?

[shmokes]

So you need a check to withdraw from a bank, where you can go into any other bank and use your debit card. 

Why?   

What a ---smurfette---.  She knows what a counter check is.  Next time ask her for a counter check, and then write the check out to "Cash".  That's how you make a withdrawal from a teller.

[SavannahLion]

I'm still trying to figure out why they charge to use an ATM when you are saving labor costs by avoiding the teller.

Is it true that other countries charge a surcharge to see a teller?

I've been told it costs money to transfer funds from one bank to another via ATM. Nevermind that a check accomplishes the exact same thing under the new "instant check law."

[mpm32]

Hell if you can get your girl to do that, more power to you.

For me the proceedure would go like this;

Ask, get smacked and beaten, spend the following weeks kissing ass because she didn't want to.

[CCM]

How about this one?

Drive up to the teller window via Drive Thu.  Use those vacuum tube thingies, put in your debit card and ID.

Ask for some cash.

Teller says "Check please".

I say use debit card.

Teller Says "Check is needed".

Teller says "use ATM".


So you need a check to withdraw from a bank, where you can go into any other bank and use your debit card. 

Why?   

If you have your debit card, why not just use an ATM in the first place?   

I don't know of any bank where you can hand a teller your ATM card and say gimme money.  You always need a check or savings withdrawal slip for a teller.

[RayB]

You pay to use an ATM if it's not your own bank! Why should one bank provide free convenience and service to members of a competing bank?

I hear though that some banks are slowly adopting "fees" for live tellers.

[koolmoecraig]

Hell if you can get your girl to do that, more power to you.

For me the proceedure would go like this;

Ask, get smacked and beaten, spend the following weeks kissing ass because she didn't want to.

Haahahaaaa. I think youre confusing this with A2M.

[Ed_McCarron]

You pay to use an ATM if it's not your own bank! Why should one bank provide free convenience and service to members of a competing bank?

Why not?  What would it actually cost 'em?

I spent a few months installing frame relay circuits into ATMs all over PA.  You'd be amazed what the banks pay in overhead to keep those things running.

You'd also be amazed:

1)  How much they weigh. (>800 lbs)
2)  How much cash they hold (depending on the location and season) ($200k+)
3)  How many morons they can find to work on installing one. (22 was the record.  All mouth breathers.)

[Jdurg]

You pay to use an ATM if it's not your own bank! Why should one bank provide free convenience and service to members of a competing bank?

Why not?  What would it actually cost 'em?

I spent a few months installing frame relay circuits into ATMs all over PA.  You'd be amazed what the banks pay in overhead to keep those things running.

You'd also be amazed:

1)  How much they weigh. (>800 lbs)
2)  How much cash they hold (depending on the location and season) ($200k+)
3)  How many morons they can find to work on installing one. (22 was the record.  All mouth breathers.)

The point is, if they charge for non bank-members to use their ATM, they can try and persuade those people to switch banks so they don't have to pay the fees.  If there is an ATM that is en route to somebody's work or near their home, but they aren't members of their bank, they'll constantly be paying money to withdraw from that ATM.  In doing this, the Bank my persuade those people to transfer their funds to their bank instead of the one they currently use.

If ATM use was free, there'd be no reason for them to ever think about changing banks.

[FrizzleFried]

I'm still trying to figure out why they charge to use an ATM when you are saving labor costs by avoiding the teller.

Is it true that other countries charge a surcharge to see a teller?

Uh,  I haven't been charged to use an ATM (of my own banks) in many many years.

[Zero_Hour]

My bank refunds all ATM fees I'm charged by other banks. I have never been to my bank as it has no physical branches that I am aware of.

I don't know if there is a ceiling on that refund per month or anything, but I have yet to hit one.

[Jouster]

I've never been charged a fee to use the ATM at my own bank...if you are getting charged for that...change banks!!

Jouster