And then there is me, who named my cat Jayne. He's dumb as a brick, but loves to fight. 
Out of curiosity, he's not a brown and white kitty is he? I was wondering if the two I got from the pound were long lost relatives....Dexter and Emilio are definitely two of the most retarded cats I've ever seen....either that or they're smarter than I think they are.
They break every mold I've read about on here about how elusive cats are. These two will NOT leave you alone. Sit down, they're in your lap....or, at least they try to be. You see, they apparently can't sit / lay down, or forget they have claws, or something...because what they proceed to do is dance around on your lap, trying to figure out how to hang on, before tumbling out of your lap. Then it's hop up, try again, fall out....repeat ad naseum.
Stories I could tell. When we brought them home, the shelter says leave them in their cardboard containers while you're out of the house ( this was the next day) since they're not used to it. Well, we did that - only to get home and find that Emilio had chewed his way out of his container, opened his brothers, and the two of them were now lying happily on the table. They did that for weeks: a friend said "spray the table with bleach, they won't get up there again." Wrong. Sprayed the table with bleach and these two idiots got up there and rolled around in it, sniffing it like catnip. Crisco, same thing (they actually licked the Crisco off the table).