Scientists Find Oldest Living Animal, Then Kill It

[Dartful Dodger]

Clam claims oldest animal record

It's quite possible others are out there in the water that are 600 years old," said Dr Wanamaker.

They won’t live to 601 because Dr Wannabe is going to cut them open to prove they're 600.

[mccoy178]

I heard this on NPR this morning.  I was a little sick to hear that they "had" to kill it to be able to count it.  Is it really worth it?

[RandyT]

Clams have no propulsion system, which means it sat there in that same spot for over 400 years.

It probably started hoping someone would come along and kill it about 200 years ago.

[danny_galaga]

Clams have no propulsion system, which means it sat there in that same spot for over 400 years.

It probably started hoping someone would come along and kill it about 200 years ago.

I cannot live
I cannot die
Trapped in myself
Body my holding cell

[patrickl]

I heard this on NPR this morning.  I was a little sick to hear that they "had" to kill it to be able to count it.  Is it really worth it?

They didn't kill it just to learn it's age.

[ChadTower]

And they had no idea it would be that old until they had killed it. 

Of course, they did say they hope to find more of them that age.

[patrickl]

Yeah, I'm afraid they were purposefully looking for old clams. The older the clam the more history they get from of it.

[ChadTower]

Must... resist... clam joke...

[Ed_McCarron]

They didn't kill it just to learn it's age.

I hope they killed it to lightly batter it, fry it, and serve it with melted butter.

[patrickl]

Fresh clam ... 400 years old.

BBC News: Ming the clam is 'oldest animal'

Guess old clams (used to check climate change and now also to combat aging) will go the way of the rhino horn.

[ChadTower]

Seriously... if they reproduced with any regularity at all the ocean floor would be freakin' covered with them.  Every time you kill one you're probably killing 50 years worth of clams.

[mccoy178]

I heard this on NPR this morning.  I was a little sick to hear that they "had" to kill it to be able to count it.  Is it really worth it?

They didn't kill it just to learn it's age.

That was what the guy on NPR said.  The interviewer asked if Ming was still alive and he said, "Well, unfortunately, to tell the age it is an involved process that involves counting from the inside..."  Or something to that affect.  It may have died from other causes, but that is what he implied.  I really don't give a crap about clams, but when something is rare, something is rare.  Why mess with it?

[ChadTower]

They mess with them because the clam has been sitting on the ocean floor for centuries recording info about water temps, oxygen levels, plant levels, etc etc... they don't really want to do it but as they get better at analyzing the shells there is a ridiculous amount of historical info in there.

They just better limit how many of these things they take or these clams will end up extinct in a hurry.

[ChadTower]

How long until he says that we need to kill more 600 year old clams to provide evidence of damage to the environment?

[patrickl]

How long until Al Gore tries to use the clam as proof of global warming?

They set out to catch and study those shells to find more about climate change. So it does make sense that this research will find it's way into one of the reports yes.

Bangor University: 400 year old Clam Found.

The Bangor scientists are sclerochronologists who study the growth and age of clams using annual growth lines in the shell in much the same way as dendrochronologists study the growth of trees using tree-rings.  Clam shell growth is related to environmental conditions such as seawater temperature, salinity and food availability.  The team analyse the shell growth histories with a view to understanding changes in the ocean linked to climate change.

[ChadTower]

Clearly global warming is being caused by the reduction of frozen 600 year old clams.  Every time they dig one up and kill it, another 5 mile chunk of ice breaks off  and floats away. 

[Zebidee]

Can you imagine being that clam, 400 years in one spot, nothing to do but filter seawater and ponder the meaning of its own existence.  For 400 years, wondering what it is all about.  Something like Deep Thought from Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.  What is the purpose?

Apparently it is to get dragged up and slaughtered by some halfwits trying to prove something as blatantly obvious as global warming.  Right after this, those same scientists will probably go and BBQ a sperm whale to prove that breathing in smoke particles are dangerous to your health.

Watch out for Vogons building space freeways everyone .....

[Dartful Dodger]

Can you imagine being 400 years old and have a 20-60 year old kill you, just so a couple of other pre70 years old can give him a Nobel Peace Prize.

To us the clam’s life looks as meaningful as a tree’s life.  To him our life looks as meaningful as an ant’s.

[RandyT]

I don't know if clams can even ponder such things.  I've never once tasted a brain while eating one.

[ChadTower]

"Honey, what did you dip this claim in, it tastes off..."

"Oh, nothing, that's just the sentience in this one."

[shardian]

Pixar should make a movie about clams. It'll be GOLD, Jerry!

[boykster]

I'm betting that global warming is caused by Chad's ever increasing post count!  That's a LOT of hot air 

[ChadTower]

I'm just trying to keep the forum from flying off into the sky.  The weight of my post count is what is keeping it down.

[shmokes]

Can you imagine being 400 years old and have a 20-60 year old kill you, just so a couple of other pre70 years old can give him a Nobel Peace Prize.

To us the clam’s life looks as meaningful as a tree’s life.  To him our life looks as meaningful as an ant’s.

Did Al Gore kill this clam?

[shmokes]

It's pretty interesting.  I wish they could figure out and cure (preferably within the next couple years) aging.  There's no good reason for it.  It's not like we have all our cells when we're eighteen years old and then we start wearing out like any other product.  Our cells simply, and arbitrarily, decide to reproduce at a slower rate.  There's no reason why they must behave this way.  They just do.  Trees don't behave this way.  Tree cells just keep reproducing indefinitely.  A tree can live to 1000 years old, so long as it isn't killed by wind or disease or lack of nutrients.  I'm not asking for immortality, but I'd just like my body to stop voluntarily killing itself.   

[Dartful Dodger]

A tree lives on water nutrients in the soil and sunlight.  Try mixing the amount of salt and sugar you voluntarily ingest to water and feed that to the tree.  You'll quickly see the trees cell structure "voluntarily killing itself" too.

Did Al Gore kill this clam?

Not yet, but the primaries are still young, he has plenty of time to take credit for it, then claim he was misquoted.

[boykster]

It's pretty interesting.  I wish they could figure out and cure (preferably within the next couple years) aging.  There's no good reason for it.  It's not like we have all our cells when we're eighteen years old and then we start wearing out like any other product.  Our cells simply, and arbitrarily, decide to reproduce at a slower rate.  There's no reason why they must behave this way.  They just do.  Trees don't behave this way.  Tree cells just keep reproducing indefinitely.  A tree can live to 1000 years old, so long as it isn't killed by wind or disease or lack of nutrients.  I'm not asking for immortality, but I'd just like my body to stop voluntarily killing itself.   

Unfortunately, nearly every effort to circumvent the Hayflack limit imposed by degraded telomeric regions on our DNA tends towards cancerous growth.  Interestingly enough, cancer cells may shed the most light on anti-aging research;  if markers can be found to determine when and why cells become cancerous (and essentially immortal since cancer cells don't suffer from programmed cell death in the same way that normal cells do) then there may be some way to short-circuit the aging process.

Don't expect it in 2-3 years though.  Even if a therapy was available today in a pre-approved form, it would take years to come to market.

[ChadTower]

Did Al Gore kill this clam?

Yes, but it's okay, he bought several clam credits to make up for it.

[patrickl]

Not yet, but the primaries are still young, he has plenty of time to take credit for it, then claim he was misquoted.

You're just upset that ...


            GORE WON!!!

[danny_galaga]

Clearly global warming is being caused by the reduction of frozen 600 year old clams.  Every time they dig one up and kill it, another 5 mile chunk of ice breaks off  and floats away. 

 

[danny_galaga]

Can you imagine being 400 years old and have a 20-60 year old kill you, just so a couple of other pre70 years old can give him a Nobel Peace Prize.

To us the clam’s life looks as meaningful as a tree’s life.  To him our life looks as meaningful as an ant’s.

youve never eaten oysters, or mussels? did you feel bad? animals like clams have a very rudimentary nervous system- there isnt even a 'brain' at the end of it...

[jbox]

Unfortunately, nearly every effort to circumvent the Hayflack limit imposed by degraded telomeric regions on our DNA tends towards cancerous growth.  Interestingly enough, cancer cells may shed the most light on anti-aging research;  if markers can be found to determine when and why cells become cancerous (and essentially immortal since cancer cells don't suffer from programmed cell death in the same way that normal cells do) then there may be some way to short-circuit the aging process.

Except cancer just has to be good at reproducing, while shmokes wants his cells to keep doing their original job. It's also possible we may instead prove that faster growing lifeforms need exponentially more self-repair capabilities in their DNA then slower ones. In which case I think it far more likely you'll get the Gattica/Blade Runner issues well before you get immortality because those manipulations will turn out to be much easier to stabilise.

[Bones]

I'm not asking for immortality, but

I am. I got a lot of stuff I want to do.

[Singapura]

Clams have no propulsion system, which means it sat there in that same spot for over 400 years.

It probably started hoping someone would come along and kill it about 200 years ago.