I messed up a bit and can see I wasn't as clear as I should have been with my initial post.
The phone for the wife is of no concern to me or her. Honestly, she's good with the Razr, and in reality, her phone is secondary. She only wants a phone that will replace her current Moto i510, but get better reception, which is darn near any phone. She's getting an increase in minutes (double), which is all she cared about. The real need is my phone.
I work for Pepsi now, and I'll be getting a discount for that. We're set up so that I DO have to go into a store, but it's only to pick up whatever I order. I don't have to pay for any phone except crazy-new phones and/or newer smart phones, and even then, it'll only be $50 or less.
Battery life is turning out to be THE most important feature for me, since I'm now really set on eliminating my mp3 player from my pocket, and the bluetooth headset we get thrown in on our deals obviously eats up battery life far quicker. I'm also good with the non-stereo earpiece thingamabob, since the majority of what I listen to is spoken-word (books and podcasts).
Shmokes, does your wife use a bluetooth headset with her phone, or is the battery life you're speaking about with the handset alone? I like that the KRZR is a clamshell too. Your Pearl would run me $50, but I'm thinking it might be overkill for me. I also have to stick it in my pocket all the time (wearing it on my belt would just get it beat to hell and back, and quickly require replacement). Does the keypad have to be locked all the time when used like that, and would you consider the process to lock/unlock the thing at least a dozen+ times a day to become tedious?
The package we're offered includes a car charger for free for every phone, some little throw-in bluetooth headset, every phone seems to be either free, $20, $35, or $50 unless we find it anywhere else for less (including online offers, and I'm believing I can find darn near any phone for free online), a few crappy cases (generic all-in-one slip-in cases I'll never EVER accept) as throw-ins, 50% off memory cards (if a phone can use one), and a discount on the primary phone of whatever plan I choose (I'll be getting a family plan, so I'll get a discount off the total plan price).
Thanks for all the responses so far.