De-Rail this thread!

[Glaine]

The name of the game is de-rail the thread, all you have to do in some way relate to the topic and then get as far from it as you can. This shouldn't be very hard for most of us, I see it here all the time! In a way, this is a training seminar. 


The beginning topic is lunchmeat preferences - I for one hate Ham, I much prefer Roast Beef.

[ChadTower]

We don't need training.  We are the best at what we do, salami stuffer.

[Donkey_Kong]

 salami stuffer.

I don't know what to do next...I'm lost.

[MustardTent]

We don't need training.  We are the best at what we do, salami stuffer.

Ohh!  Name calling.  Good.

To continue:  Yeah, we can do this on our own, you cocktard.   

[ChadTower]

He's the one who told us to tie in luncheon meats. 

I think my turtle tank has developed algae.  The water is all greenish now.  Gotta figure out how to eliminate that.

[Glaine]

Yeah, I just wanted to start up a game of sumthing new. I'm the Glaine and I approve the following messages:

 

We don't need training.  We are the best at what we do, salami stuffer.

Ohh!  Name calling.  Good.

To continue:  Yeah, we can do this on our own, you cocktard.  

To continue the game:

A fun way to eliminate Algae is with an algae eating fish, can't remember what they are called, they look like little snakes to me.

And speaking of elimination, when do you think the user account problems will be fixed? I was locked out most of this week.

[ChadTower]

You can't put algae eaters in with turtles.  Turtles are algae eater eaters.

I still haven't decided whether or not to mount the incoming LCD to my bedroom wall or to use the accompanying stand.

[Glaine]

Well what kind of tank do you use then? And what size turtles are we talking? I just had a big tupperware tub I put em in and would just dump all the water out and fill it up all over again but if you have a real tank that wouldn't work out well.

I still haven't decided whether or not to mount the incoming LCD to my bedroom wall or to use the accompanying stand.

No need for walls, attach it to my rugged chest, I am stud enough for any job.

And speaking of stands, I once dated a stand up comedian. She would always stand me up and she always seemed to think it was hilarious!

[ChadTower]

Well what kind of tank do you use then? And what size turtles are we talking? I just had a big tupperware tub I put em in and would just dump all the water out and fill it up all over again but if you have a real tank that wouldn't work out well.[\quote]

50 gallon with a cannister filter rated for 10x the water load (the tank is only half full).  The turtles are 6" and 4.5" (eyeballed).  You can't really just keep them in a tub of tap water like that, not if you want them to be healthy and live a long time.  There is too much stuff like chlorine in tap water.  The turtles would eat those algae eaters, they'd eat snails, they'd eat pretty much any living thing I put in with them.  I often feed them 2" chunks of pork and they devour it like nothing.

And speaking of stands, I once dated a stand up comedian. She would always stand me up and she always seemed to think it was hilarious!

I'm not sure what that meant but I can see her laughing at you.

[Glaine]

There is too much stuff like chlorine in tap water.

Thats a good point for the folks at home but I have 1 line for regular water for watering the lawn and such and one line from my well which is pretty pure for use in the house.

I'm not sure what that meant but I can see her laughing at you.

You can see her laughing at me? Shes over there with you isn't she!

[ChadTower]

Yeah, but over here she's more of a kneeldown comedian.  And she's not that funny, but she sure is entertaining.

A well could work, though I'd be sort of afraid of heavy mineral content.  I'm still learning about aquarium setups, I have never had one until someone gave me these two turtles a few weeks ago.

[Glaine]

She can't hide her lying eyes. Because I'm comming over there to scoop them out and rub salt in the wholes. Then I'll probably kick a puppy all the way back home.

Yeah, I've got a lot of minerals in the well water, but I had turtles for years without any sign of sickness or anything. Though you really can't tell the whole winter season anyways cuz they sleep so much. I always just caught mine down at the lake, along the shorelines in spots without too much wake.

[shardian]

This reminds me of my High School Junior English class. Everyday, the teacher would require us to do a free-write on a particular subject. I would open with a sentence about the subject, then de-rail and talk about how stupid the assignment was for about a page, and then close with one sentence answering the topic in some way. I swear the guy never read them, as I got an A on every one.

[ChadTower]

They probably wouldn't be sick per se... but things like shell deformation as they grow could easily happen with the wrong water balance.

Don't kick a puppy, kick a small poodle.  That way it's not a crime.  It's just good fun.

[Glaine]

This reminds me of my High School Junior English class. Everyday, the teacher would require us to do a free-write on a particular subject. I would open with a sentence about the subject, then de-rail and talk about how stupid the assignment was for about a page, and then close with one sentence answering the topic in some way. I swear the guy never read them, as I got an A on every one.

A particular subject I want to master is the ultimate racking kick. I plan to buy a maniquin and a large supply of hacky-sacks which I will mount on the maniquin and plan to be able to pop any such sack by the end of it. Making fun of said "sack-fu" will only result in getting moved higher up on my list.

[ChadTower]

Dude, we all know your sack-fu is for your mouth and not your foot.  Don't lie.

We saw your phallus drawer.  It looks like a summer squash garden in there.

[Glaine]

Don't kick a puppy, kick a small poodle.

But poodles are so effiminate.
That would be like beating the French.
At least the puppy has the potential to spend his growing years becoming stronger so he can one day get his revenge. Like Kazuya Mishima from Tekken wants to kill his dad for throwing him off a mountain.

The poodle would just surrender. Again, like the French.

[ChadTower]

Yeah, but you're only spending one kick.  Get a bag of them and bring them to a set of goalposts.

[Glaine]

I..uh...I was hungry.

Way to bump yourself up the list, youz gonna get served like you was next in line at Arby's.

Speaking of, doesn't the Arby's sign itself look absolutely phallic as well? I keep expecting it to shoot Ranch Dressing out the top of it. And the commercials where the guy has one hovering over his head? Better slogan is, "I'm thinkin I'm a D*** head".

[ChadTower]

No one speaks English at Arby's.  I'll be standing there like "where's my fries" and you're all on the phone with Troi arguing about which of you has to bring that stained dress to the cleaner.

[Glaine]

No! It's nothing like that!
I always have to go.
Troi is always too busy making dinner.

I'm not actually an illegal alien, I just don't like to shave and I'm always falling asleep at the deep fryer and falling in. Which is why I don't have to shave, you stop growing hair after its been scalded off a few times. But man I went up like an alchohol covered Q-Tip (after you've just cleaned your MVS collection with it) that first time, when I had all my hair.

Now kids think I'm a Nosferatu.

And I'm not supposed to say, but those Roast Beef sandwhiches you like so much are actually made from the callusous on my hands. Sometimes I burn em on the burger grill. Again, falling asleep.

[ChadTower]

I don't eat 'em.  I use them to feed my turtles.  So there are probably bits of digested you floating around in a 50 gallon tank (with only 25 gallons in it) in my living room. 

Stop talking about kids' "things" and how you'd like to go Nosferatu on them.

[Glaine]

Yeah, once your turtles eat enough of my hands, they will be blood bound to me and serve me non-emergancy, slow moving purposes.

Why would I turn kids into vampires? Not necessary, kids make life heck without all the super-powers. Though it would be great because then I could just shove them outside and watch them burst into crispy powder.

[danny_galaga]

                                                              grunties

[Bones]

I telling you man, it grundies not grunties.

[danny_galaga]

I telling you man, it grundies not grunties.

not from where i'm standing...

[Glaine]

...I don't know what these words mean...

[ChadTower]

They're both things you hear in German Midget Dungeon Porn.

[RayB]

I wanna move to Denmark and stare at the Speed Bandits all day.

[tommy]