I feel like Ayn Rand.
Why, do you write sucky, 1500 page novels filled with paper-thin, two dimensional characters who talk like they were scripted by a 7th grader? Do you argue by setting up ridiculous, unrealistic hypothetical characters who set up straw men for you to easily destroy?
Phew.....had to get that off my chest. Wading through Atlus Shrugged was torture. I mean, I ain't a hard sell. I believe in capitalism. But Ayn Rand can't construct a real argument to save her life. For the uninitiated, allow me to lay out an Ayn Rand novel for you.
1- Come up with a single, black & white premise, e.g., capitalism is good. Do not attempt to add any depth to the argument.
2- Write a 1500 page novel in which you do nothing but repeat the premise over and over and over again ad nauseum.
3- In order to prove that your premise is correct, take advantage of the fact that you are the author and so you don't actually have to address the real-life arguments of sane people. Just create a few protagonists who are god-like in their intelligence and abilities and who are ultra benevolent, moral people who don't make mistakes or have to poo. In fact, every character you create who agrees with your premise (capitalsim) should have these qualities. Now create a bevy of characters who disagree with your characters, but make them all bumbling morons who can barely be counted on to tie their own shoes in the morning. I cannot stress how important this step is. These people have to be beyond stupid. If they don't agree with your premise you absolutely CANNOT RISK allowing them to seem remotely competent or talented in any way whatsoever, lest an unwary reader understand that as a tacit approval of socialism.
4- Perfect. You have now set yourself up with a foolproof way of winning arguments. Just argue with yourself. Ignore the arguments of real people so you can spend all day countering the straw men that you set up in your path. It does wonders for your self esteem.