I friggin give up!
Ok, so when I was at autozone I payed particular attention to how they hooked up the wires and noticed that the way it works is that the ground is provided by bolting the starter to the motor, the solenoid gets full time power directly from the battery and when you apply 12 volts to the smaller stud that's when it all starts to happen. So, I hooked up the ground end of some jumper cables to one of the mounting holes and touched the positive one to both the all-time connection and the smaller one and it spins right up and pops over into the engaged position! Yay, that's what it's supposed to do!
So I install the thing again which pissed me off beyond all belief as it didn't want to cooperate. It was bolted into place and the all-time power was connected to the correct spot. I then tried to use the end of a ratchet handle to jump the connection between the all-time power and the small stud that makes it do it's thing... Well, it didn't work. It sparked all over the place and clicked realy fast and loud back and forth. No good! Well, that's where I'm at now.
I realy have no idea what I'm doing so perhaps it's a good thing that I'm quitting although I certainly can't afford to have it fixed so there goes the Rock 101 Sky Show and the NE-BYOAC meet!
I friggin hate my life!