I'm breaking the law!

[JoyMonkey]

Squeal and I'll take you all down with me!

• In Massachusetts it is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
• No one may take a bath without a prescription. (Applicable to Boston residents only)

There's some kind of loop-hole here. I need to talk to my lawyer so I can legally take a bath. I haven't had what I'd call a 'full bath' in months. I shower and I usually do it in the morning.

I've also broken this one in the past:

• An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.

I moved here in 2002, so I'm innocent of this heinous crime:

• Tattooing and body piercing is illegal. (Repealed October 2000)

Another law I like to break every so often (just for kicks):

• No one may cross the Boston Common without carrying a shotgun in case of bears.

More outdated laws that are still in effect here and here

[Shape D.]

I would carry a shotgun across boston commons just to keep true to the law. and shove it in their face when they arrested me.

[ChadTower]

If you've been to Boston Commons, you need one anyway half the time.

[RetroJames]

heh...Georiga....

Wha'd you say??  Them sounded like fihtin werds!

- You have the right to commit simple battery if provoked by "fighting" words.

[mr.Curmudgeon]

If you've been to Boston Commons, you need one anyway half the time.

I prefer thicker skin....jeez.

What, are you afraid of Water fountains? Flower-beds in the spring? Rollerbladers in the summer? Ice-skating in the winter? Free Shakespeare in the Park?

No one will hurt you, promise. Unless you are allergic to sunbathers and/or street performers.


mrC

[ChadTower]

I used to have to walk through it at night to get home from work.  It was like playing a side scrolling beat 'em up.

[HaRuMaN]

I used to have to walk through it at night to get home from work.  It was like playing a side scrolling beat 'em up.

LOL

[GGKoul]

If you've been to Boston Commons, you need one anyway half the time.

I miss the Bostom Commons TV show...

[DrewKaree]

That Boston Commons show wasthe BOMB DIGGETY! 

My wife and I were PISSED they took that off, and on their website, they spoke aobut how they recieved so much correspondence that they were probably going to do another un in the next season's summer lineup to test a different spot, and to look for new episodes in fall.

Stinking lying TV PR people.  I bet those people are the kind who pull the wings off of flies and let them go....bastidges!

[rampy]

I'm pretty sure you'll have to buy a homeless run newspaper to benefit the homeless... or do they just give that speil to me, when I got to boston commons?

[Magnet_Eye]

some U.S. Laws:

"Persons may be placed in jail for up to five years for shooting a hole in a penny. "

"It is illegal to give free alcohol to Indians who live on reservations. "

"To be a dominatrix is illegal."

"No person may appear as a contestant in more than one game show a year."

"A US citizen can take possession of any foreign, uninhabited island, as long as it contains bird droppings."


 

[DrewKaree]

"A US citizen can take possession of any foreign, uninhabited island, as long as it contains bird droppings."

If I claim it as my own country, then I can retire on said island without having to pay taxes!  w00t!

When they say "uninhabited", are there guidelines with that to define "uninhabited"?

[ChadTower]

No, but there are guidelines to define foreign, very likely:

Not landlocked within the US or within US territorial waters.

[daywane]

No one may cross the Boston Common without carrying a shotgun in case of bears.

[ChadTower]

Are thay nuts?!!!
shotguns will just get you a REAL pissed off bear

Anyone who has grown up around bears will tell you that a shotgun will chase a bear off immediately unless you are deemed a threat to their cub.  We used to use them to scare off bears all the time back home.  Big bang + big sting = fleeing bear.

This does not apply to grizzlies, but if you're close enough to an angry grizzly to use a shotgun you're already dead.

[Harry Potter]

"A US citizen can take possession of any foreign, uninhabited island, as long as it contains bird droppings."

If I claim it as my own country, then I can retire on said island without having to pay taxes!  w00t!

When they say "uninhabited", are there guidelines with that to define "uninhabited"?

Uninhabited can mean no intelligent life. Means we can claim Tasmania. 

[ChadTower]

In that case I can claim half the US.

[Harry Potter]

Or all of New Zealand.

[Harry Potter]

In that case I can claim half the US.

Just Texas. Oh wait, America wouldn't have a president then.

[DrewKaree]

Sure they would.  Obviously you weren't following the story.  If Chad claimed Texas, then he'd be king/president/grand poobah of Texas.

Only problem is that Texas isn't an island. 

Where is it you said you lived again, boss?  I may have an island to claim

[ChadTower]

Sure they would.  Obviously you weren't following the story.  If Chad claimed Texas, then he'd be king/president/grand poobah of Texas.

Only problem is that Texas isn't an island. 

Where is it you said you lived again, boss?  I may have an island to claim

I wouldn't claim Texas.  Unlike the idiots, I have learned from history, and know that Texas is not up to becoming independent via force.

Now, no one has ever tried to take Montana.

[GGKoul]

This does not apply to grizzlies, but if you're close enough to an angry grizzly to use a shotgun you're already dead.

You'll be ok if you're wearing one of these suits... http://www.nfb.ca/grizzly/suit.html

[ChadTower]

Those guys are nearly as tall as an angry grizzly and can jump a lot higher.

[Stingray]

Only problem is that Texas isn't an island. 

I've got a shovel and a lot of spare time on my hands. I'm also strategically located in Oklahoma.

-S

[mr.Curmudgeon]

Only problem is that Texas isn't an island. 

I've got a shovel and a lot of spare time on my hands. I'm also strategically located in Oklahoma.

-S

*ZING*!!!  ROFL!

A-MEN!
mrC

[daywane]

Are thay nuts?!!!
shotguns will just get you a REAL pissed off bear

Anyone who has grown up around bears will tell you that a shotgun will chase a bear off immediately unless you are deemed a threat to their cub.

[SirPeale]

Do you think David Foley could kill a bear?

[ChadTower]

Who is David Foley?   

[SirPeale]

Isn't that the Ultracade guy?

[Shape D.]

Do you think David Foley could kill a bear?

No way, that guys a sissy.

[ChadTower]

Isn't that the Ultracade guy?

Ah, I haven't been following the Ultracade threads. 

[Truz]

haha great thread.


We have an old outdated law like that here too.  It hasn't been enforced since the days of prohibition but there is still some law requiring ducks to wear long pants.

[DarkKobold]

Do you think David Foley could kill a bear?

He'd probably try and trademark wearing brown fur, and then state the bear was infringing on his trademark, and would have to pay him royalties or change the color of his fur. Ebay would pull the bears auctions of fine china sets, and the bear would maul David Foley. All would end well. Especially with the mauling part.

[Stingray]

Do you think David Foley could kill a bear?

He'd probably try and trademark wearing brown fur, and then state the bear was infringing on his trademark, and would have to pay him royalties or change the color of his fur. Ebay would pull the bears auctions of fine china sets, and the bear would maul David Foley. All would end well. Especially with the mauling part.

I love a story with a happy ending. Was the bear beautiful?

-S

[Harry Potter]

Where is it you said you lived again, boss?  I may have an island to claim

Sure. It's all yours. The only problem is, it comes with Danny_Galaga. 

[DrewKaree]

That's A LOT of hair to deal with just to claim an island....mebbe I can connive Bones into shaving 'im down for me....coupla drinks and a NASCAR race and I bet he'll cave to my demands.

* DrewKaree goes back to refining his "taking over one small part of the world at a time" plan.

[JB]

Sure they would.  Obviously you weren't following the story.  If Chad claimed Texas, then he'd be king/president/grand poobah of Texas.

Only problem is that Texas isn't an island. 

Where is it you said you lived again, boss?  I may have an island to claim

I wouldn't claim Texas.  Unlike the idiots, I have learned from history, and know that Texas is not up to becoming independent via force.

Tell that to Mexico.

[SNAAKE]

"A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll. "

^ DAMN I break this law like ALL the time !

"The penalty for jumping off a building is death."

"Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business."



LOLOLOL...newyork is like da BEST !!!!111!!!
 

[ChadTower]

Tell that to Mexico.

Mexico isn't a country, it's just the crap south of where Texas decided the desirable border was.

[missioncontrol]

Strange Laws - US & Around the World

In the USA:

ALABAMA:

- It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.

- Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.

- You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.

CALIFORNIA:

Chico:

- Bowling on the sidewalk is illegal.

Fresno Laws

- Elementary schools may not host poker tournaments.

Los Angeles

- Toads may not be licked.

San Francisco:

- It is illegal to wipe one