Almost got fired......

[danny_galaga]

or fling dog poo at him with a shovel (",) (",)

[ChadTower]

Flinging dog poo with a shovel is a very satisfying action if you hit the target.

Sitting on your porch waiting for the cops to show up is less fun but when you realize they're not coming, you will laugh.

[fredster]

I recently was having a bit of trouble with a fellow employee who was giving me a bit of $hit and I noticed he had some sort of germ phobia, he was always washing his hands all the time and I recalled a time someone touched his hair he freaked out a little, anyway one shift he started up and I warned him to stop but he didn't, he had himself a bit of an audience and was obviously enjoying himself at my expense, later on when there were no witnesses I reminded him of my warning and grabbed him, put him in a headlock, ruffled up his hair and gave him a juicy wet willie, he freaked out but never gave me $hit again.   

That is soooo beautiful.  Looking for the weak point, waiting for it, and then pouncing when he least expected it.

Cuddos 

[Q*Bert_OP]

or fling dog poo at him with a shovel (",) (",)

No, an flinging Ultrapoo machine will work better.