How To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity

[Jabba]

Twenty Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity


1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point A hair dryer paintball gun At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with That.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favors"

7. Finish all Your Sentences With "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Dont use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, MoonWalk Rather Than Walk.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. When someone asks, "Are we ready to begin?" Ask why the meetings don't start with the pledge to the flag. Extra points if you actually stand up and start to say it. Double the extra points if you follow the pledge with your national anthem.

[missioncontrol]

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point A paintball gun At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

I thought it was a hair drier...........

[missioncontrol]

21. Inist that all your co-workers call you by your new professional wresling name "Rock Hard"

[Jabba]

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point A paintball gun At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

I thought it was a hair drier...........

Yeah, you're right, I changed it to paint gun due to the male nature of this group of folks.

[missioncontrol]

but a hair drier looks more like a radar than a painball gun 

[Jabba]

Good point...

[missioncontrol]

If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day,
   how come nothing is free yet?