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Land of the free?
ChadTower:
It's great that your children are that way. One of my children is a cooperative angel who never has been and probably never will be spanked. The other... you can scream, you can take things away, you can put him on timeout, you can make him lie face down on the floor for an hour. He still sometimes does whatever he feels like and will ignore you AS you're disciplining him. The only way to get through to him when it really matters is a spanking. That's it. I've tried everything else a thousand times. I'm not saying I abuse him, but from time to time a couple whacks on the behind will get his attention when nothing else will.
My brother, as a kid, needed to be spanked. Oh man did he ever. He didn't give a CRAP what ANYONE told him. Teachers, parents, me (I'm 7 years older). By the time he was 13, half the time the only way to get him to mind was to beat him from one side of the yard to the other. Sometimes I had to do it myself because there wasn't a male figure there strong enough to do it other than me. I am 100% convinced if not for some of those fights he'd be in jail or dead right now. Some kids, boys for the most part, need it to stay in line and adhere to social rules.
shmokes:
--- Quote from: fredster on March 07, 2005, 09:03:42 pm --- Likely, you are a result of non spanking. This should be a lesson for us all.
--- End quote ---
Nope....I'm the result of spanking. Jesus, that was an easy point to shoot down.
Perhaps you would consider parenting advice from Andrea Yates. She had five kids. By your standards I'd guess that puts her at least on par with you. Hell, if you're an average American that makes her twice the parenting expert that you are.
DrewKaree:
--- Quote from: saint on March 07, 2005, 09:20:54 pm ---
Oh I gotta answer this one...
I have 3 children. 8 years old, 5 years old, and a 16 month old. I have never spanked nor do I expect that I will ever spank my children
....Spanking should be a last resort in my opinion.
--- End quote ---
Nowhere, however, did you rule it out. You simply feel it should be a last resort, and stated that you don't expect you'll do it. You MAY change your mind in the future, circumstances depending, and therefore have enough sense to not rule it out.
It seems as if shmokes feels (and I'm assuming this due to the severity of his proposal on how to deal with parents who do it) that it cannot be done, and has stated that parents who spank their kids should be castrated and isolated on an island.
Your oldest is 8. Careful, that shadowy figure standing outside your window with a dull spoon is shmokes.
I think the stance of castration and isolation is way beyond rational - even if it IS simple hyperbole in an attempt to make his point. Always saying never ignores that children have a mind of their own that your intended methods simply won't be able to address.
saint:
--- Quote from: DrewKaree on March 07, 2005, 11:52:12 pm ---Nowhere, however, did you rule it out. You simply feel it should be a last resort, and stated that you don't expect you'll do it.
--- End quote ---
Of course I didn't rule it out. I went out of my way to point out that I thought it was every parent's perogative, if a choice I think is too often used and in poor judgement. I will say I think way too many people spank their kids because they think the Bible says they should, or spank when they are angry, or use an object such as a belt to smack the kid (why in the hell do you need to hit your kid harder than your open hand can handle?), or cross that line between discipline and abuse. I wonder how many people who use spanking as their primary form of discipline have even tried alternatives (did I ask that already?)...
--- Quote ---You MAY change your mind in the future, circumstances depending, and therefore have enough sense to not rule it out.
--- End quote ---
I try rarely to say never, but I bet I never end up spanking any of my children.
fredster:
Saint, I hope you don't either. I don't have to now. It only took a couple of times. I didn't like doing it either. Having said that, he had crossed the line I set for him very far. He knows where the line is at now.
--- Quote ---I wonder how many people who use spanking as their primary form of discipline have even tried alternatives (did I ask that already?)...
--- End quote ---
That is what gives it a stigma. It's too easy for some.
I believe that used often, it looses it's power completely. (sort of like the wife complaining) Used once or twice, and threatened when necessary, it has much more psychological power.
Shmokes, I took my parenting advice from Parents. I take monetary advice from people with money. I take medical advice from doctors. If I want to know how to be an jerk, I'll ask you, okay?
Drew do you think Shmokes ever went to the woodshed?