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Main => Everything Else => Topic started by: missioncontrol on October 14, 2005, 02:15:47 pm

Title: Best headlines
Post by: missioncontrol on October 14, 2005, 02:15:47 pm
THE YEAR'S BEST HEADLINES OF 2004:

Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
[Imagine that!]

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
[No, really?]

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
[Now that's taking things a bit far!]

Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
[Not if I wipe thoroughly!]


Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
[What a guy!]

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
[No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!]

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
[See if that works any better than a fair trial!]

War Dims Hope for Peace
[I can see where it might have that effect!]

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
[You think?]

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
[Who would have thought!]

Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
[They may be on to something!]

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges !
[You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?]

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
[he probably IS the battery charge!]

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
[Weren't they fat enough?!]

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
[Taste like chicken?]

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
[Boy, are they tall!]

And the winner is....

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Title: Re: Best headlines
Post by: mr.Curmudgeon on October 14, 2005, 02:33:36 pm
Funny!  :D

Title: Re: Best headlines
Post by: Harry Potter on October 14, 2005, 02:34:49 pm
Drew makes intelligent argument


Tommy's officially NOT a flamer


Stingray looses slacker of the year to Chad
Title: Re: Best headlines
Post by: DrewKaree on October 14, 2005, 11:25:10 pm
Boss7 loses bet with Drew.  Loses his "S"

;D
Title: Re: Best headlines
Post by: Harry Potter on October 14, 2005, 11:48:09 pm
Quote from: DrewKaree on October 14, 2005, 11:25:10 pm
Boss7 loses bet with Drew.  Loses his "S"

;D
There you are. Just trying to flush you out.
Title: Re: Best headlines
Post by: duffjr on October 15, 2005, 02:32:46 am
http://www.humormatters.com/newspaper.htm

favorite:  Notice: to person or persons who took the large pumpkin on highway 87
near southridge storage. please return the pumpkin and be checked. pumpkin
may be radioactive. all other plants in vicinity are dead.
Title: Re: Best headlines
Post by: Stingray on October 17, 2005, 09:47:58 am
Quote from: duffjr on October 15, 2005, 02:32:46 am
http://www.humormatters.com/newspaper.htm

favorite:  Notice: to person or persons who took the large pumpkin on highway 87
near southridge storage. please return the pumpkin and be checked. pumpkin
may be radioactive. all other plants in vicinity are dead.

Now that's[/b] funny!

-S